


Boredom

by badwolfchild



Category: White Collar
Genre: F/M, Family, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, slight angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-05
Updated: 2014-12-26
Packaged: 2017-12-10 12:23:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/786017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badwolfchild/pseuds/badwolfchild
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>also x-posted on ff.net<br/>A bored Neal in the office does not make a happy Peter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Procrastination

**Author's Note:**

> All mistakes are my own, I was watching Glee while typing it from my notebook and just a quick proof read right now. (I love Matt Bomer in Glee!!)
> 
> Disclaimer: Not mine, not now and never will be...

Neal let out his tenth sigh of the hour, causing Diana to look up and glare at the ex-con.

"Caffrey, will you find something to do like, I don't know, the mortgage fraud case Peter gave you an hour ago."

Neal glared as she got back to work. He opened his desk drawer randomly and peaked in. Inside he spotted a bag of chips he threw in once. The bag didn't open right away so he was crinkling it, the sound echoing threw out the white collar unit.  Jones, now irritated, stormed over and just ripped the bag out of his hands to open himself. He threw the bag down and went back to his desk.

Neal, realizing it's probably _not_ the best idea to bother two people who carry guns, went quietly chewing and twirling his pen in his hand. He then started the most common procrastinating move; drawing.

 Almost two hours later he finished and, looking at the clock, noticed he needed to finish the report in an hour if he wanted to get home to June's on time.

He quickly finished the report (with 15 minutes to spare) so he ran it up to Peter's office, knocking then entering the room without waiting for an answer, burst in while putting on his hat and dropping the report on the desk in one swift move.

"'Night Peter." Neal tried to leave quickly but was stopped by Peter's voice.

"Neal wait," He turned around and took his hat back off. "It took you," Peter looked at his watch. "Four hours to write one report." He raised a brow.

"Well Peter I got a _little_ off track..." Neal started what both him and Peter knew was a lame excuse for the tardiness.

Peter sighed and finally glanced down at the report  for the first time. He gasped and started back at Neal.

"Hey Neal?" Peter kept his voice even but that seemed to only make Neal _more_ nervous.

"Yeah buddy?" Neal flashed the famous Caffrey grin.

"Why does this report have a border of what looks to be a brick wall with vines and flowers growing on it?"

"Because I couldn't think of anything else at the time to draw as a border." It almost came out like a question than an answer.

"You know Neal, back when I was in school if we doodled on our work the teacher would make us redo the assignment."

Neal groaned. "You want me to redo the report don't you." Neal stated.

Peter smiled. "There's that brain of yours in use. But don't worry, this isn't going to be thrown out."

Neal looked confused. "Then why...?"

The older man smirked. "It's going on the fridge."

Neal looked at Peter like he couldn't tell if he was joking or not. "Okaaaay. I'm just going to go do that report again." He turned on his heel and went back to his desk, every so often glancing up at Peter's office up the stairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TBC?  
> I was EXTREMELY bored in my english class last week and wrote this baby up instead of working on my speech. All the stuff Neal was doing in this was what I noticed EVERYONE in class doing. I drew what Neal did in this fic (I spent 2 and a half periods on it!) and at some point I'm going to put it up on my deviantART but I wanted to get this up first.   
> Second point, I'm thinking of making a SEQUAL for this so I'm going to leave it in-complete for now. If I do, it won't be for awhile, I'm in a play at the moment


	2. Bored dot com

The monday afternoon blues has hit Caffrey hard as he started at the report he should be typing up on the computer. Ever since the day a couple weeks ago when he drew all over the case he should have been working on and Peter made him redo it, he had to do everything on the computer where it was doodle free. Peter was not happy that they had to stay late that night because apparently the bureau did not like the idea of a criminal staying alone unsupervised, ex-con or otherwise.

 Back to the present, Neal casually opened a google webpage and searched bored. The first cite that came up was bored(dot)com, a gaming cite he heard Jones mention in the van during a stakeout once. Making sure that the sound on his computer was off, he clicked on the link and found what looked like an interesting game called Boredom Test.

Looking around to make sure no one was watching he slightly turned the computer monitor toward him and away from wandering eyes then got into the test...

*line break*

Peter pinched the bridge of his nose as he looked away from his monitor and looked out over the bullpen to give his eyes a much needed rest. His gaze landed on his CI hard at work typing on his computer. Peter squinted as he realized while it looked like Neal was typing at a glance, he was really only pressing one key; a space key to be specific.

"Damn it Neal," Peter sighed as he dragged his hand across his face and got up.

He went down the steps and towards Neal's desk. Diana spotted him and was about to say something but was stopped by Peter putting his finger to his lip in a shushing motion while pointing at Neal. She nodded and got back to work but still kept an eye on the two.

Peter stood right behind the unaware CI and just watched him for a second as he pressed the space button to make a ball jump over gaps in the ground but he kept falling through at the same spot.

Aware that Diana was still watching he pointed and mouthed 'what is he doing?'. She leaned over to see and shrugged. Peter rolled his eyes and decided to make himself known.

"So explain to me how this is related to that embezzling scam."

At Peter's voice Neal jumped and closed the window revealing a blank word document. He spun around and looked up to see Peter with his arms crossed.

"Ummm," Was all Neal got out before he was pulled to his feet shoved in the direction of Peter's office.

"My office. Now."

Neal nodded and went straight there as Peter hung back and turned to Diana. He waited for Neal to close the door before he spoke.

"Any idea how long he was at it for?"

She shook her head. "Sorry boss."

"That's alright, it's not your job to make sure he stays on focus the whole time, he _should_ be old enough to know how to do that by now."

"Key word is 'should be'?"

Peter cracked a smile as he walked up stairs but it vanished as he walked in and closed the door.

"Sit."

"What am I, a dog?"

"No," Peter replied as he sat down. "Because dogs listen and do as they're told. Now sit and write the report here."

Neal glanced at Peter like he grew a second head. "In case you didn't notice, my computer is at my desk."

"And in case _you_ didn't notice, that didn't turn out very well. Now you're going to write it right here on my desk where I can keep an eye on you and make sure you don't goof off."

"With what-" Peter got in his desk and threw out a pen and a notebook of paper. "Show off."

"Now get to work. El wants you over for some dish she's testing from this new cater."

"Yes Dad, and if I finish early will Mom let me have desert?" Neal flashed his Caffrey grin that Peter knew he used just to tease him.

"How about you finish and you don't get grounded."

Neal was a little shocked that Peter was playing along but didn't let it should as he smiled. "Yes sir."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These are really fun to write and in case you are wondering, the game Neal is playing is real and I kept getting stuck at the part where Neal was. Y'all should play it and comment how far you get and what per cent boredom you get. Mine was 30%


	3. Sleepovers

Peter yawned for the tenth time and realized that he's read the same sentence a third time in a row and still had no idea what it said. Putting down the paper, he stretched as he reflected how the day went. It started out normal, a little slow since they had no high priority case floating around, but then he did something he was really regretting; make Neal redo work. He could have just accepted it as it was, drawing or not, but he wanted Neal to realize that that's not very professional to be doodling all over his work but damn the kid had to make him suffer now too!

Peter sighed and collected his things while glancing at the time on his computer as it shut down reading 10:19 and his stomach growled, reminding him that he hasn't eaten since his deviled ham at noon. He came down the stairs and went to Neal's desk to let him off the hook but was surprised to find him dead asleep on the report, pen still in hand.

He relaxed a little at the sight of Neal's bangs in his eyes and how young and peaceful he looked. Peter shook his shoulder slightly but Neal just groaned and buried his head in his arm to block out the bright florescent lights.

Peter shook him a bit harder. "Come on buddy, time to wake up. You can sleep in the car."

When all he got was a groan in return he decided to try a different tactic. "El has some of that fancy food you can have,  I know you haven't eaten since lunch."

Neal opened his eyes and sat up slowly, all the while stretching. "You make me sound like a stray cat."

"Well you do have a leash as Mozzie would call it, we can just add a little bell."

Neal glared as he got up. "Are you done?"

Peter was smiling now. "And you are very cat-like the way you strut around,"

Neal put on his messenger bag as he opened the glass doors leading to the elevators. "Haha, you should quit your day job, become a comedian."

"It's your fault we had to stay late, I think I'm allowed to make all the jokes I want. Plus if I quit then it would mean back in the orange jumpsuits for you."

"You know, orange really isn't my color, it washes me out."

"Alright Cojo, whatever you say." Peter patted Neal on the shoulder.

*Line break*

The duo didn't get to the house until around eleven that night but they were surprised to find that Elizabeth was still up. "Hey hon, what are you still doing up?" Peter greeted her with a kiss.

"I knew you'd be home soon so I waited up. Hi Neal, I heard Peter was keeping you hostage."

"Yeah," Neal got up from petting Satchmo. "Apparently the FBI doesn't appreciate it when you doodle on forms." Neal shot a glare at Peter.

"Which reminds me," Peter took his briefcase to the kitchen despite the two confused looks he got. Following him in, they found him putting something on the fridge with a magnet. "There."

Neal groaned when he realized what it was. "Peter come on, I thought you were joking."

"Sweetie, did you draw this? I think it's beautiful." El straightened it out on the fridge then opened it to get the leftovers out.

Peter and Neal went out to the dining table to sit down.

"No fair, you used Elizabeth."

"And you wouldn't have done the same if you were in my position?" Neal didn't say anything and Peter took that as his answer. "That's what I thought."

Elizabeth came over then carrying two plates, one had the 'fancy food' as Peter called it and the other with a deviled ham.

"Haven't you exceeded your deviled ham limit of none a day?"

"Haven't you-" Peter started but El cut him off.

"I'll go set up the guest room for you."

"You don't have to do that, I'll just get a cab-"

"Not this late you're not. Just stay here for the night, no argument." El walked off before Neal could put another word in. Peter smirked and took a bite of his sandwich. They kept eating and filled the silence with the occasional word or two of mindless chatter.

When they finished Peter took Neal to show him to the guest room. Elizabeth met them at the door and handed Neal some sleep wear.

"Here are some old clothes of Peter's that should fit you." When Neal looked at them and then started to laugh. It was a grey shirt that says Property of Marine Corps Base Quantico and the sweats were the same.

"So I finally get to go to Quantico?"  Neal held up the shirt smirking

"You wouldn't last a day at Quantico. You actually have to work there and you can't draw on any of the work."

"El, how do you live with this man?"

"Good night Neal." El spoke up putting an end to the banter between the two.

After Peter and El went to bed and Neal had changed (and then rolled up the ends of the sweats, Peter did have a few inches on him) Neal used his 'cat-like' abilities to sneak down stairs to the kitchen and take something off the fridge.

*line break*

The next morning Neal woke to the smell of bacon being fried. Making sure he didn't trip as he went down stairs, he made his way to the table where Peter was eating some eggs. He looked up and wiped his mouth.

"Hey there Quantico, how'd you sleep?"

"Morning Neal."El smiled from the oven where she was frying the bacon.

"I slept great."

She brought over the pan with food and a plate with two eggs on it. "Sit, eat. You're too skinny. Those were small on Peter." She gestured to the clothes that were hanging off him. She then sat to start eating. "Oh, I forgot the orange juice." She started to get up but was stopped by Neal.

"Let me get it, you cooked all this." She sat back down as he smiled.

"Thanks Neal." He went to the fridge to open it but hesitated when he saw something that shouldn't be there, his drawing. Putting on his best con man face, he continued to get the juice and went back to the table.

"Here you go."

"Thanks Neal, you didn't have to, you're the guest." El glared at Peter where he was sitting at the head of the table.

"Wha," Peter asked with a mouth full of food.

"It's fine, I get coffee and stuff for Peter all the time."

"I thought you guys had clerks for that?" She was still looking at Peter.

"He has something better, he has me." Peter glared at him to his left. "Wow, this is really good bacon." Neal dug into the bacon, finding the plate a lot more interesting to look at and the conversation ended there.

 

Over the next three weeks Neal had found different reasons to sleep over and every night he would take down and hide the picture in different places then the next morning it would reappear on the fridge as if by magic. On the fourth week Neal had another reason to sleep over. After putting on the Quantico sweats for bed (which Peter had named 'Neal's PJ's' for the number of times Neal had used them while sleeping over in the past couple of weeks) Neal snuck down stairs and planned on ripping up the stupid drawing once and for all! He turned at the bottom of the stairs and Satchmo got up from his place on the couch to greet him.

"Shhh Satch, go back to bed, go on boy." He whispered. The kitchen light turned on and El's voice rang out.

"And here I thought you were staying over for my cooking," She held up the drawing. "Was this what you were looking for?"

Neal took a deep breath. "El I-"

"No, it's fine. It's your drawing anyway. Here, that was mean of Peter and I shouldn't have dragged it out." She handed him the paper. "But for what it's worth, I really do think it's beautiful. 'Night."

Neal kept standing there. "Good night." When she was gone and Neal heard the door close, he slid down the wall. He started at the picture in his hands as Satchmo came up and sat next to him. He looked at the dog. "What should I do Satch?" The dog just curled up next to him then looked up at him. He sighed, "Yeah, I guess I should."

Petting Satch on the head, he got up...

*line break*

The next morning, Elizabeth was the first up as always and went to the fridge. She almost missed it but she stopped and gasped. Putting her hand to her mouth, she looked at the drawing with the same border but instead of average paperwork in the middle it, it was of her and Peter on the couch smiling with Neal on the ground with Satchmo. She had tears in her eyes when Peter came down yawning.

"Hon, what happen, are you ok?" She just pointed at the drawing. "Wha- oh, wow." He smiled and hugged her while kissing her head.

On the top of the paper were two words in perfect cursive,

_My Family._   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That totally went off from what I originally had planned, but I think it's also a lot better than before. It helped that I was listening to Fix you by Coldplay and Blink by Revive. Y'all should listen to it while reading from when Neal was coming down stairs and runs into El.


	4. Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this idea is from the amazing Peppe1951!!! (over on ff.net)

"No way man, I know you're good, but you're not that good." Jones replied to Neal as he took a sip of his coffee. It was a couple of days after the computer incident and Peter was still forcing Neal to work in his office. At the moment Neal was out getting Peter coffee as revenge for when they swapped identities and Neal made Peter get him coffee, even though it was months ago.

Neal, being the social butterfly that he is, was taking his sweet time and chatting to Jones. "I'm telling you, name anyone in this office and I can lift their wallet and put it back without them noticing." Neal commented cockily as he grabbed the sugar and poured enough to make a dentist have a heart attack.

"And I'm saying I don't believe you." You can practically see the gears turning in the ex-con's head as he sniffed some milk. Almost gagging, he then smirked and poured some in the now sugar flavored coffee. "Ok, what the hell are you doing?" Jones finally broke and had to ask.

Neal glanced up at him with a twinkle in his eye. "Do you really want to know?"

"No, I have a feeling we're all going to know about it from Peter sooner or later."

"That's the right attitude. Now, how much are you willing to bet I can pick anyone's pocket without their knowledge?"

"A Ben Franklin says you can't pick Peter's wallet by the end of the work day and put it back without him noticing."

"Deal." They shook hands and Neal left to take Peter the no-longer-coffee. As Jones sat down a minute later he, along with most of the people in the bullpen, heard Peter swear and yell quite loudly. "Damnit Neal, what is this crap!" Jones smirked while shaking his head and got back to work.   

Peter came out of the office with Neal grinning in tow. "After all the stunts you've pulled in the last couple of weeks and now this added to the list, I'm starting to question how old you are." He lectured then spit in the sink trying to get rid of the taste lingering in his mouth.

"Well according to the files you have on me I was born in '77."

"Which is based on the information we got from you." Peter was still rinsing out his mouth as Hughes came down to see what all of the commotion was about.

Neal shrugged. "Then it must be true."

Hughes sighed as he reached the two. "What'd Caffrey do now?"

"I was just being the good pet-convict that I am and fetched Peter here some coffee like he asked. It's not my fault no one threw out the expired milk." Neal explained with his innocent-as-thou face.

"No more pranks Caffrey, we're not the NYPD."

"Yes sir." Hughes threw one last glance between the two then went back up stairs to his office.

"Listen Peter, I'm sorry about the coffee. It was immature and I should be above petty pranks like that. Now let's put it behind us and hug it out." Neal stuck out his arms in a jester of peace. Peter squinted, trying to figure out Neal's angle. Everyone was looking around, waiting for Peter to do something. Peter, noticing that people were starting to whisper to each other, realized with Neal standing there with his puppy eyes, that people were seeing him as the bad guy.

"Fine." He sighed and gave Neal his hug. He then marched back up to his office. "And I want you to make me a new coffee. Something edible this time."

"On it Butch." Neal gave a little salute.

"Thanks Sundance." As soon as Peter's door closed he pulled his left hand out from behind his back which was now holding the older man's wallet.

"Hey Jones, I'd like to see my old pal Benny now."

"No way, the deal was that you also had to put it back. Better get to work cause you have about," Jones looked at his watch. "Three and a half hours 'til the end of the work day."

"I've done more with less."

"And Peter hasn't had lunch yet so you have even less time."

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh is right." The door opened up stairs and Peter came down to the bullpen. Neal quickly slid the wallet into his pocket.

"Hey Sundance, I'm gonna need a rain check on the coffee. Just remembered that I was going to meet El for lunch and if I don't leave now I'll be late again." The agent said as he slid on his jacket.

"Um, can I go with you?" Neal asked the first thing that came to mind.

"No. This is just a lunch with me, my wife, and my dog. No where does that include Neal."

"Please, I forgot money for lunch and you can use me as an excuse for why you were late."

Peter looked at his watch. "Know what this isn't worth the fight, and every minute arguing is another wasted from being with El. Grab your hat and let's go."

Peter started walking ahead while Neal lagged behind. He flipped his hat on and grinned at Jones.

"Good luck man."

"Neal, let's go or you can find your own meal. Oh and one more thing," Peter stuck out his hand. "Hand it over before your eating prison food for 3 straight meals."

"Peter, I have no-"

"Cut the crap Neal, I've known you for eight years. I know how to spot a lift from you." Neal handed him the wallet then turned and put a bill in Jones's waiting hand.

"Thank you." Peter rolled his eyes. He then plucked the hat off the kid's head and threw it back on the desk.

"My office. Now."

"But Peter, I haven't had lunch yet."

"You can eat the salteens by the coffee maker. Go. And Jones, next time, don't encourage him. In fact, give me."

"But-"

Peter glared. "You want to come join him?"

"You know, you should get lunch on me today."

"That's what I thought. Come on, delaying means less salteens for you."

Up in Peter's office, Neal collapsed into what has become his chair at the corner of the desk. Peter reached into his desk and pulled out a notebook and pen. He just looked at the items then back at Peter.

"What am I suppose to do with this?"

"You are going to write."

Neal looked at him like he grew a second head. "Write what?"

"I will not steal or gamble in the office."

"So, that'll only take, what, 20 seconds?"

"You will also write it," Peter looked at how much money was betted. "One hundred times. Once for each dollar."

Neal just stared. "Oh and if you don't finish before I get back it will be double that. Better get started." Peter patted him on the shoulder as he left. Neal sighed and picked up the pen.

~line break~

Peter finally made it to a little cafe right outside the office. "Sorry I'm late." Peter greeted El as kissed her and sat down.

"It's fine hon, I already ordered. What'd Neal do this time?"

"How did you know it was because of Neal?"

"Because you have your 'Neal did something stupid' look."

"Well first-"

"Hold on Satch, He's numbering them." El smirked as she pet the dog.

"You should have been there, first he," Peter then went on sharing with all the events that went on this morning. El nodded and tried not to laugh through the whole story. "So I sat him in my office and told him to write 'I will not steal or gamble in the office' one hundred times." Peter finished off.

Elizabeth started to laugh as she put down her sandwich that came during the story. "Honey, you had him write lines?"

"What's wrong with that?" Peter asked with his mouth full from his deviled ham.

"Nothing it's just, never mind." She finished off her sandwich looking at Satchmo the whole time.

Peter whipped his mouth and took a sip of water. "No, what is it?"

"You just, you sound like his father."

Peter choked on the last of his water. "What do you mean?" His voice was a little horse.

"Well," El started to count on her fingers. "You make him redo work, put his drawing on the fridge,"

"Oh my god, I've become his father." Peter stopped listening.

El smiled. "Well Satch and I have to go. You should invite Neal over for dinner, I'm making Italian." She kissed her husband goodbye. "See ya later."

"Bye hon." He mumbled. After a couple of minutes he sighed as it registered. He sighed and called over the waitress.

"Will that be all sir?"

"Can I just get one sandwich to go?"

~line break~

"And done." Neal threw down the pen right as Peter walked in.

"Good thing you started when you did or you'd be doing an extra hundred. Now you can clean up all these salteen wrappers that have appeared on my desk." Peter sat down and started to work on the computer.

Neal groaned and then smelt and saw the bag. "Wasn't the writing enough? Now I have to sit here and smell your leftovers for the rest of the day? And just so you know, salteens do not fill you up, if anything they just make you thirsty."

"How about instead of complaining you go get a coffee for each of us." Neal was glaring as he got up but Peter never looked up from the screen. "Then you get your ass back up here and eat this sandwich melt before it gets cold."

Neal's eyes lit up. "Thank you Peter, thank you thankyouthankyou!" He ran out of the office and but then ran back in. "Forgot your mug." When he was gone he finally looked up and chuckled as he shook his head.

He was back in two minutes flat and started to dig through the bag. Finding the sandwich, he ripped it open and started to eat it greedily.

"Don't eat too much, El mentioned something about Italian for dinner."

Neal swallowed. "Yes Dad." He said sarcastically then went back to eating. Peter froze as he remembered his conversation with El only a half an hour ago. Watching Neal from the corner of his eye, he shook his head and went back to work, pushing everything to the back of his mind. 


	5. High Tempers and Temperatures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay, I was having horrible writers block on what to write next. After this chapter things might be slow on updating since school is starting up next week. Senior Year!! yay me! One more year than I'm outta that hell hole! (You can tell I really like school)  
> Second thing, PLEASE send me ideas, even just little things you guys do while bored. Remember, even the littlest of sparks can start a great fire!   
> (P.S. Who loved Neal in that cardigan last week? *squeels*)  
> Now enjoy the slightly more hurt/comfort chapter called:   
> High Tempers and Temperatures

"Peter, please shoot me now..."

"Neal, for the last time, sit up. Come on, head up. If we all have to work through this, then so do you. Find some way to get through it."

 Today was currently the first day of a summer heat wave, with last night hitting ninety and then triple digests by ten in the morning; everyone was suffering. Normally it would be bearable inside but today was also the day that the AC in the White Collar Unit decided to not turn on, causing everyone on the floor to feel the pain. 

Neal took a deep breath and sat up. He then reached to the cup and instead of taking a sip of coffee, took the last sip of ice water. Still thirsty but not wanting to get up he just slipped one of the ice cubes into his mouth and clicked it around. After about a minute the ice was small so he bit into it, filling the otherwise silent room with loud crunches.

Peter glanced up and glared before going back to work. Neal did this again and the older agent gripped his pen tighter and tried to ignore the crunches. Neal looked up and finally noticed his partner. With one last crunch, he swallowed and spoke up.

"What's up with you?"

Peter threw down his pen in frustration. "You, that's my problem! You and your stupid ice chewing! And your not being able to sit still and, and just the way that you always act like a ten-year-old ADHD BRAT! I'm SICK of having to act like your FATHER when I'm just your FBI handler, NOTHING MORE!"

The room filled with silence except for the heavy breathing by Peter who belatedly realized that he left his door open, hoping to get an extra breeze in the office, and that everyone down in the bullpen had heard everything and were staring up at the two of them.

Peter spoke up first in a softer voice. "Neal, I'm so-"

Neal shoved his hat on, despite the heat, and covered most of his face with it. He cut off Peter with his voice thick with emotion. "Excuse me _Agent Burke_." He then leapt up like his chair was on fire and made a bee-line out the doors of the White Collar Unit in record time, disappearing around the corner to the left.

Peter took a deep, shaky breath then yelled, "Damnit!" And then banged his fist against his desk. Never in the eight years he had known Neal had he ever heard him speak in such a bitter tone as he had with those last two words that kept echoing in his head. _'Agent Burke'_

Running a hand threw his hair, he pulled out his phone and closed the door to his office. Sitting back down, he spoke up. "Hey hon,"

_"Hi Hon, what's going on? It's only ten-thirty."_

"It's just, I think I just screwed up big time,"

*line break*

Down in the bullpen, everyone looked at one another not sure what to do. Slowly everyone started to get back to work except Diana and Jones who kept staring at one another, not able to find their voices.

"Wow." Diana finally said.

"Yeah." Jones forced out, still in shock.

"I'm gonna go check to make sure Caffrey's alright."

"Yeah." Jones just repeated.

Diana got up and went around the same corner as Neal and found the only route the kid could have gone through. She opened the door to the stairwell and felt a blast of cool air. Diana took in the scene in front of her, Neal had his back to her while sitting on the steps leading down and he was holding up his head in his hands, fingers in a tight grip tangled in his hair. She closed the door and heard quiet sniffles. Realizing she was going to have to talk first she said the first thing that she thought of.

"So they have the air running in the one place that half the people in the building doesn't even know exists and yet the place where everyone works they say isn't gonna be fixed until the end of the day."

Not getting any reaction out of him, she went over and picked up the discarded hat to the left of him and sat down in its place. The only sign that she got from him that he knew she was there was from the way that he turned his head away.

She studied the hat in her lap and spoke up again. "Maybe I'll just go get my work and laptop and work the rest of the day in here. Be a lot better than boiling out there with the rest of the guys. And I swear, I've used about half of my perfume today alone."

"I know what you're trying to do and you can just stop right now. You can't con a conman."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Diana just kept fiddling with the hat.

Neal finally looked up at her and she couldn't help but notice that his eyes were red. "You would make a horrible conman."

"Conwoman." She corrected him and he cracked a small smile.

"Con _woman_ sorry." The two of them fell into a more comfortable silence.

Diana was the first to speak. "You know, everything that Peter said back there-"

"I don't want to talk about _Agent Burke_ right now." He clenched his fist and bit his bottom lip.

"-He didn't mean a word of it."  

"Yeah well, I'll believe that when I hear it from him. He was pretty clear what he meant back in his office, like you and everyone else heard."

"Then go back and talk to him. Hear what he has to say."

"No offence, but I don't want to hear anything else that he has to say right now."

Diana sighed then shrugged. "Okay, do whatever you want." She stood up and patted his shoulder. "I'll be right back."

"What are you doing?"

"I wasn't kidding about working here, it's really nice. Unless you've taken over the whole stairwell for yourself." She threw his hat back on him.

He grinned and fixed it. "Now what kind of gentlemen would I be if I made you work in the horrid environment out there?"

"Yeah yeah, I'll be right back Caffrey."

"One more thing?"

"What?" Diana fake sighed as she turned around once more.

"Think you can bring back your perfume?" He grinned.

Diana just gave him a look. "Really? Are you joking?"

"What?" He gave an honest look of innocents. "I would rather smell like a women's perfume than have to go another minute of smelling my b.o."

Diana scoffed and shook her head. "Only you Caffrey, only you." She then turned to walk out.

"So is that a yes? Diana?" She just walked out and the door slammed. Neal sat sideways at the top of the stairs against the inside railing and sighed. He subtlety smelt near his arm pit then quickly wrinkled his nose.

*line break*

_"You_ what _?!"_ El shrieked into the phone after Peter explained what had happened.

"I didn't mean to! It's just, it's about a hundred degrees in here and he kept chewing that ice and I started yelling and once I started, I just started to yell things that I didn't mean!" Peter was in near hysteria now and he paused to take a deep breath. After a couple of seconds he continued in a slower and more shaky voice. "El, if you would have seen his face... I feel like complete crap. After everything these past couple of months and then to yell that I don't care about him, and in front of everyone for that matter, honey I," Peter pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. "I just don't know what to do."

_"Are you done?"_ El finally spoke.

Peter nodded but quickly realized his mistake and spoke up with a quiet yeah.

_"Now I want you to get off your ass and go apologize to our boy."_

"But what if-"

_"Did I stutter?_

"No but-"

_"Then go. See you two when you get home, oh and honey?"_

"Yeah?"

_"I love you."_

"Love you too." They hung up and Peter sighed as he ran his hands down his face.

*line break*

When Diana walked back into the cool stairwell with her laptop and folders in one hand and the perfume in the other, Neal was just staring off into space still in the same exact spot that he was in when she left. As soon as he saw her the mask was back up and he grinned at her.

"Here you go princess." She joked while handing over the bottle.

"Thank you." He then sprayed it all over himself then at last sprayed it on his wrist and rubbed them together. While Neal was busy Diana sat back down and got on her laptop then handed him a folder when he finished.

"Might as well keep yourself busy somehow until Peter shows up."

Neal glanced up from the folder he was reading and frowned. "What makes you think he's going to come looking for me?"

"Because for some strange reason he cares about you."

Neal went back to looking down at the folder but didn't even try to comprehend any of the words. "What makes you say that?"

"Remember when I told you about Charlie?" Neal nodded. "Well, when I was little I got into a huge fight with him about the stupidest thing and said things that I didn't mean. An hour later we had made up and went to the kitchen and ate about a gallon of ice cream together." She smiled at the memory. "Neal look at me," He looked up and their eyes locked. "The way Peter looks at you every day when he thinks no one is looking, it's the same way Charlie did. He just gets this twinkle in his eye."

Diana didn't say anything and just let Neal process everything. After a minute Neal spoke up. "You were really lucky, having someone like that in your life growing up."

Before Diana had a chance to question him about that the door opened and they looked up to see Peter standing awkwardly in the doorway. Neal turned his head away and pulled his hat down.

Diana stood up. "I'm gonna give you two a minute." Neal looked up at her with eyes begging her not to leave. "And Neal, you're lucky too." She gave a soft smile and Peter stepped to the side and let her leave.

The door clicked shut and Neal glared at Peter, making him speak first. "So," Peter sat down next to the younger man. "I see that you and Diana found a cool place to work." He chuckled slightly but Neal just continued to glare with his hat half shading his eyes, giving him an evil look. Peter sighed and pulled the hat off.

"Hey!" Neal reached for the hat but Peter pulled it out of reach and hung it up on the railing above him.

"Come on, buddy, you know I'm horrible at this stuff."

"Give me my hat back." His voice was oddly calm.

"Kiddo, look-"

"Don't call me that and give me my hat."

" _Neal,_ " He stressed the name. "I'm really, _really_ sorry."

"I want my hat back!" Neal raised his voice for the first time.

"Forget your stupid hat for a second!"

"It's mine and I want it back!" Peter realized that talking it out was like yelling at a wall. Throwing  caution to the wind, he grabbed the kid by the shoulders and pulled him to his chest in a great big bear hug.

"Let go of me!" His voice was muffled as he struggled to get free.

"Shhhhh, come on buddy, calm down." Peter rested his chin on top of Neal's head and cupped the back of it with his right hand. His struggles got weaker and Peter realized that he was shaking now and was clutching Peter's shirt in a death grip. "Hey, hey, shhhhh. I got you, it's alright, it's all good now." Peter was speaking in almost a whisper, his voice just loud enough to be heard over Neal's quiet sobs. He had his other hand rubbing up and down Neal's back and in a couple of minutes the younger man had calmed down.

Peter's arms had lowered slightly and he leaned back, bringing Neal with him and they shifted to a more comfortable position but he still held him in a loose hug. "Everything I said," Peter broke the silence. "I didn't mean _one_ word of it, and if I could turn back time, I would have the second after I yelled."

"I know,"

"So am I forgiven?"

Neal gave a small smile even though he knew that Peter wouldn't be able to see. "For now." He snuggled closer but then leaned back enough to look at Peter. "You smell really bad."

Peter grinned and pulled him back to him. "Guess you're gonna have to deal! You're stuck with me now." Peter sniffed him and then saw the bottle of perfume on the ground a couple of feet away and laughed. "Are you wearing perfume?!"

"Don't judge, it's better than smelling of sweat."

Peter shook his head and the two pulled away but Peter still kept an arm around the other's shoulder. "Oh, what am I gonna do with you?"

"Can't live with me, but can't live without me?"

"You are the second best thing to ever come into my life." Peter confessed.

Neal tried to brush it off. "Glad to know I rank above Satchmo."

"Oh, I forgot about him, guess that makes you third best."

Neal opened his mouth to speak but Peter beat him to it. "Joking. Don't worry, you rank above the dog."

"Better not let Satch hear that." His voice cracked at the end and Peter caught it.

He looked at him closer and noticed something and smiled. "Is that a tear? Did I get a tear?"

Neal scoffed and wiped his eyes. "No, my allergies are just really bad. The air's been real bad since it hasn't rained."

"Right," He agreed even though he knew for sure that he's never had allergies. "You know, I think mine are getting pretty bad too."

Neal smiled and leaned into Peter. "Thank you, Peter."

"You're welcome kiddo." He leaned back a little. "I can call you that right?"

Neal chuckled and play shoved him. "Shut up." Peter ruffled his hair. "Can I have my hat back now that you've officially ruined my hair?"

Peter grabbed the hat in question and looked at it. Instead of handing it over he put it on and fixed it like Neal. "What'dya think? Should I start going rat pack?"

Neal laughed. "Naw, you're more Butch than Dino."

Peter frowned. "Butch wore a hat."

"He also jumped off a cliff into a river."

"You can swim right?"

Neal's smile vanished. "Not funny."

Peter couldn't help but laugh at his expression. The door opened and Diana poked her head in. "Are you two good?"

Neal turned. "Diana, please tell him not to jump off a cliff into a river."

She closed the door and took in the sight in front of her; Peter was still chuckling with Neal's hat on and said owner of the hat looked like he just rolled out of bed by the state of his hair, and the both of them had red eyes like they had been crying.

Diana smiled and started to relay the message. "Boss-"

"I got the message." He fixed the hat again. "Now what do _you_ think?"

She shook her head. "Sorry boss, that's not working."

He took it off and looked at it again. "Yeah, guess you two are right." He put it back on Neal. "Much better." Neal took the hat back off with a roll of his eyes and hung it up on the railing. "Now," He stood and stretched. "I'll be back."

The two looked confused. "You guys have a good set up here, and I can't stand that heat anymore." Peter explained.

After Peter left Diana raised a brow at Neal. "Don't say it." He spoke first.

"You know, if I were a complete stranger and walked in on that scene; I would think, without a doubt, that you were father and son."

"Okay, that's not what I thought you were going to say."

"What else would I say?"

Neal realized the corner he was backed into and decided to bite the bullet. "You really would be a great conwoman. You were right, Peter came looking for me and he does care."

"Now was that so hard to admit?" She sat down next to him and bumped their shoulders. "On a more serious note, what I said before was true, you can easily pass as his son."

Neal spoke in a quieter voice and started to fiddle with his nails. "I never knew my dad as a kid, besides by stories, and my mom was around but not, _around_. I had Ellen, a friend of my dad's, but she could only do so much." He paused and inhaled. "Peter's the first person to really give a damn and, given me a chance to start over." Diana was speechless. It was like pulling teeth getting Neal to talk about his past and he just about nut-shelled it for her. "Now when I think of those stories, I can't help but, think of Peter."

"You should tell him."

Neal looked at her like she was crazy.

"You're having dinner with Peter tonight right?"

"If I don't El will drag me there herself but-"

"But nothing, trust me on this, Peter cares about you as if he raised you himself."

"I'll think about it."

"I think you two have to be related. Even when the facts are laid right in front of you, you two are both too bone-headed to act on them!"

"Thanks for the advise Dr. Phil, but we already have Oprah helping us out."

"Whatever you say," She shrugged then to twist the knife she added. "Princess."

"You're not gonna stop calling me that are you."

"Not a chance." She laughed as Peter walked back in with an arm full of folders.

"Stop calling you what?"

"Nothing!" Neal yelled but not quick enough to beat Diana's declaration.

"Princess."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Forget I asked, I don't want know." He then spoke to Neal. "Up. Let me sit on the stairs."

"But I was here first." Neal whined.

"What are you, five?" Peter hit him in the back of the head with one of the folders. "Now move. You're young."

Neal shuffled down a step then went to the left in front of Diana and smirked. "Alright old man."

Peter glared and growled a little as he sat down in the now vacant spot. Neal just kept smiling and leaned back against the older man's legs.

Peter took his left hand and ruffled the other's hair again, but this time kept the hand on his head. "You know, I'm pretty sure we're creating a fire hazard sitting on the steps." Neal pointed out randomly.

"Guess I was right about one thing, you defiantly have ADHD. And you're five." Peter grinned as Neal stuck his tongue out at him.

Diana, forgotten during the exchange, just watched the two go back and forth like a tennis match. _'Oh yeah,'_ she thought ' _Defiantly father and son.'_


	6. Bolivia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is officially the fastest chapter I ever wrote. But I really wanted to get another one out there before school.   
> If you guys can tell I've been playing Neal's Stash on their site. ^.^;; That was what got me started for this chapter last night then I thought of the real plot this morning.  
> Another thing, if you guys have never seen the movie Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid GO WATCH IT. You don't have to for this chapter but it's a really good movie and Butch and Sundance are a lot like Peter and Neal!! Plus the title of this chapter will make more sense. In the movie while on the run, Butch said they should go to Bolivia.   
> And If anyone watches The Middle, I threw in a small reverence to it. Hint, Axl, who's my favorite, said it!  
> Now enjoy this early chapter of the Boredom series called:  
> Bolivia

Neal adjusted the air in the Taurus and Peter slapped his hand while keeping his eyes on the road the whole time.

"Hey, hands on wheel! Personally I like my life while being, _alive_. And I like this car..." Neal started to look around his seat. "What's this do?"

Peter sighed and mentally counted to ten. _'I cannot kill my CI, I cannot kill my CI, I cannot kill my CI... '_ Peter mentally chanted but chose to say out loud. "Only ten more minutes and you're El's problem." He then added. "You two can do your cooking thing and I can sit on the couch with a cold beer and catch the end of the game."

"Thanks for showing you care. No please, let me just spend at least a second with El." Neal said sarcastically as he looked out the window.

"Well sorry if I'm a little eager to hand you off after everything today," He then added with a smirk. "Princess."

Neal looked away from the window to send a glare at Peter. "Old man." He shot back.

"See, this is why I need to get away from you for an hour."

"Actually I find this banter pretty relaxing, although," He pressed a button on his seat. "This massage setting..." Peter tried, and failed, to fight a smile as Neal leaned back and closed his eyes. Neal then jumped slightly as a loud beep sounded throughout the car. Peter laughed and pressed a button on the steering wheel when he saw it was a text from El as Neal glared at him, again.

 _"Please say a command."_ The car rang out.

Neal instantly perked up. "Oh, can I say it?!"

"Fine," Peter shook his head at the kid's over eagerness.

Neal grinned. "Read message." He said clearly.

The car's voice rang out again as it read the text from El. _"Hey hon, sorry I won't be making it to dinner tonight. Something came up last minute at work that can't wait. I know Neal is coming so I left the takeout menus on the table for you boys to look through. I'll be home at nine thirty or ten at the latest. Tell Neal he better still be there. Love you, bye."_

Peter pulled up to the house just as the message ended and sighed. "So I'm stuck with you."

The two opened their doors and a blast of hot air hit them. "Gee, try and hold back your excitement." Right before they were able to start going up the steps to the front door, and Peter with his comeback, they were stopped by a thick southern accent belonging to an older lady.

"Yer Peter right?" Peter stopped and closed his eyes then turned around with a forced smile.

"That's right Mrs..." Peter paused as he tried to remember her name. She had just moved in a couple weeks ago, from Texas if he remembered correctly by what El had told him.

"Applebee," She filled in the blank for him.

"Mrs. Applebee, that's right. And how are you adjusting to New York?" Neal sighed and started to tone out the conversation. Normally he would jump right in and introduce himself but right now he was just too hot to care. He shifted his mind back when he noticed that the conversation was coming to an end.

"Now I talked to Elizabeth about this over lunch 'while go an' I was wonderin' if you two an' yer son here were goin' to make it to the lil' party I'm throwin' on the 4th."

Peter started to correct her. "Neal? He-"

Neal grinned like a kid in a candy store and threw his arm around Peter's shoulder. Time for some good old fashion payback. "-Would love to come. We got the 4th off work right Dad?"

Peter gripped the back of Neal's neck, hard. "That's right, we do don't we." Unfortunately they did have the 4th off.

"Well ain't that swell, I'll call y'all when I have the time all finalized. Have a great rest of yer day." She waved.

"You too." Peter waved back with his free hand, the other still gripping Neal's neck. He kept his hold on his pseudo-son until they got inside and lightly tossed him on the couch, a trail of ows coming from him the whole time.

Now free and on the couch, Neal's hand flew to his abused neck. "Ever heard of cutting your nail's? You almost broke the skin."

Peter was pacing back and forth in front of the couch, clenching and unclenching his fists. "What is wrong with you? Are you an idiot? No, no question about it, you _are_ an idiot."

"You know, I'm pretty sure you're not suppose to call your son an idiot." Neal threw in with a grin.

Peter stopped and pointed at Neal. "Shut it you, no more talking, zilp, zich, nadda." He then started to pace again and speaking to himself. "Why would she even _think_ you are my son? And what possessed you to go along with it in the first place? Oh wait that's right, _because you're an idiot!_ " He directed the last part at Neal.

Neal raised his hand but stayed silent. " _What!?_ " Peter snapped.

"Permission to speak?"

Peter just growled in replay.

Neal ignored that and kept on talking. "It's all your fault really."

Peter crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Oh really now, enlighten me how this is in anyway _my_ fault."  

"Because you made me redo my work." Neal simply explained.

Peter gave a dry laugh at that. "Oh this explanation will be good."

"Well if you would have just accepted my work with the drawing and not tried to be funny with it by putting it on the fridge, she never would have seen the drawing when she was over for lunch with El and jumped to that conclusion."

Peter was speechless. Neal had completely backed him into a metaphorical corner and he couldn't think of a way out. "Just, go change out of that suit before you die of heat stroke while I go order a pizza."

"Oh, can you make it half pineapple?"

"Go!" He pointed at the stairs and the kid scurried up. Shaking his head, he looked down at Satchmo who's been next to him the whole time. He looked up at Peter and tilted his head then gave a small bark. He started to rub Satch's head with a smile. "I know bud, I know."

*line break*

Neal came back down the stairs in his Quantico sweats to find Peter, changed into a t-shirt and light sweats, on the couch nursing a beer and watching the Yankees. Making his presents known he commented on the game. "Well aren't the Yankees lucky to be playing in rainy Seattle Washington."

"Tell that to the people in Washington who are wearing sweaters when it's late June. Here." Peter handed Neal a beer as the other sat down on the other side of the couch.

"Thanks." They both sat in silence except for the game and Neal's occasional sigh. Halfway through his beer Neal started to pick at the label on the bottle and sighed again for the fourth time in the last twenty minutes. The doorbell rang and Neal leaped up from the couch, thankful for the distraction. "Pizza's here!" 

Answering the door, he paid for the pizza and gave the man a tip. Back in the living room he put the pizza box on the coffee table and plopped back down on the couch. He opened the box and grinned. "Yes!" He grabbed a slice of pineapple and took a big bite. After he swallowed he spoke to Peter. "So are you going to tell El about the party when she gets home?"

Peter took a sip of beer. "You mean the way you told her we're going and that you're our son? No, that's all on you."

Neal shrugged. "Ok, she'll just think it's funny."

Peter grabbed a slice of pizza that had just about every type of meat they had on it. " _Or_ she'll be insulted that she can be old enough to have an adult son, which she can't." Peter pointed out.

"So we'll just say that I'm your son and that you were a wild nineteen-year-old."

Peter did some quick mental math. "Last I checked, and I'm pretty good at math, I wasn't nineteen in '77, I was about fifteen."

"What movies do you have?" Neal jumped off the couch and went to the DVDs. "You have _Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid_? We should watch it!" Peter caught the obvious deflection but let it go. As the movie started Neal spoke up again. "Want to go rogue? We can be like Butch and Sundance."

"You hate guns." Peter pointed out.

"We can go to Bolivia. El can go with us, plus I can speak Spanish, I'll have to teach you though."

Peter got insulted. "Hey, I can speak Spanish. Took all four years of it in high school."

Neal smirked. "But that was like a hundred years ago."

Peter clipped him in the back of the head. "Just watch the movie."

*line break*

About halfway through the movie the duo were both full, having ate most of the pizza, and Neal yawned. He started to lean against Peter and Peter in turn put his arm across the kid to hold him. He looked down to see Neal's eyes start to close. "Tired?" He spoke softly.

Neal brought his legs up on the couch and gripped Peter's arm. "No." He replayed but a yawn halfway through his speech betrayed him. "Maybe a little bit." He amended.

 Peter put his feet up on the coffee table and shifted. "Just a little bit, huh?" Not getting a response he looked down to see him dead to the world. Looking up he saw Satchmo watching, his attention on them since they started talking. "Just tired enough though, don't you think Satch?" The dog just put his head down and closed his eyes. Peter took this as a queue to rest his eyes too, but just for a minute.

*line break*

At nine forty five, El unlocked the door and walked in to find the title screen of what looked to be _Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid_ running on a loop. She looked to the couch and found the two movie watchers fast asleep. Awing, she pulled out her phone real quick and snapped a picture. She then sighed when she saw that they left out the pizza on the coffee table.

Satch opened his eyes and yawned. Seeing his mommy he got up and trotted to her. Noticing the dog she whispered. "Hey boy, these two sure made a mess, didn't they?" She cleaned up and put the leftovers in the fridge. Walking back out she saw Peter opening his eyes and smile when he saw her.

"Hey hon," He whispered. "I meant to clean that up but I fell asleep."

"It's alright," She leaned down gave a quick kiss. "Plus it looks to me like you have your hands full, or arm in this case." She sat down in the seat across from the couch and turned the TV off. Peter looked down with a smile to see Neal still asleep and gripping his arm. "Is it safe to assume that you two are on friendly terms again?"

Peter sighed and looked up. "In a way," El gave a confused looked and Peter explained better. "You know Mrs. Applebee?"

"Yes, and that reminds me, I have to call her tomorrow to say that we can make to that that party she mentioned a couple weeks back for the 4th."

"Well this one took the initiative and said we can go already."

El was still confused. "What's so bad about that? I know you don't like neighborhood  parties but it would be rude not to go."

"It's not that he said we can go, it's the way he said it. She asked if us and _our son_ can go, meaning Neal. He then jumped in and started calling me Dad in front of her."

El covered her mouth and snorted. Peter glared at her. "You're laughing aren't you. He said you would laugh."

"I'm sorry honey, it's just," She giggled again. "It is pretty ironic that she thought that."

Peter smiled a little despite the glare he still had. "Yeah, I guess so. But he's still in trouble."

Neal yawned. "Who's still in trouble?" He asked, his right hand going up to rub sleep out of his eye while the other kept its grip on Peter's wrist.

"Welcome back to the world of the living." Peter commented.

"Peter is, because he has his feet up on the coffee table." El smirked.

"Wha? But-"

Neal laughed and closed his eyes again. "Haha..."

"Hey, come on buddy, stay awake. There is no way I am carrying you up those stairs." Peter lightly shook him awake. Neal turned into Peter's shoulder and muttered. "Bu' I don' wanna Da'..." Peter sighed and looked to El for help but she was grinning like it was Christmas.

"I'm going to be sleeping on the couch, aren't I." Peter stated.

"Look on the bright side, it's probably about ten degrees cooler down here. I think I'll get a sleeping bag and sleep down here too."

"Thanks." El gave him another kiss but he kept pouting. She then ruffled Neal's hair. "Night sweetie."

"Nigh' momma..." El awed then went up stairs.

Peter squinted at him. "Bet you're proud of yourself, huh?"

Neal shifted more onto his chest. "Yes, I am..."

Peter smiled and laid his chin on the others head.


	7. Middle Ground

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finally got this chapter done! Mozzie is the funniest and hardest person to write for, ever!  
> PLEASE READ THIS PART: THE TIME LINE FOR THIS IS SOMETIME MID-SEASON 3 BUT WITHOUT THE TREASURE!!!!!!! THIS CHAPTER IS AT LEAST AFTER DENTIST OF DETROIT   
> Middle Ground:

"So you've been busy." Mozzie commented while twirling a goblet of red wine, at the head of the table and back to the door that Neal just entered from.

Neal glanced at the half empty bottle on the table. "You too apparently. You do know that wine doesn't just appear by magic." He grabbed a glass from the kitchenette and poured some. He leaned back and studied his oldest friend. "So what's got you riled up that you have to raid my wine collection?"

"Nothing that you wouldn't already know about, Suit Junior." Neal gave him a confused look. Mozzie picked up the cell phone laying on the table in front of him and pushed a couple buttons. When done, he slid the phone to Neal who looked down and saw a picture of himself sleeping on the couch with Peter from yesterday.

"I got this from Mrs. Suit last night. I then talked to her on the phone this morning. Neal," Mozzie then finally broke into a smile. "Why didn't you tell me The Suit was your Dad?" Neal rolled his eyes and got up as Mozzie continued. "Man, I know you have daddy issues, because of your past, but The Suit? Seriously?" Mozzie went to pour more wine but Neal snatched the bottle out of his hand.

"I do not have 'daddy issues' as you call it." Neal then turned and put the bottle on the counter.

"Not even the best of conmen can con themselves, do you want me to get a little notebook? Dr. Haversham has an opening right now."

Neal turned back around and leaned against the counter. "Moz, stop it."

Mozzie grew more serious. "Neal, and I can't believe I'm saying this but, your relationship with The Suit, Peter, might do you some good. I know you see him as a father figure-"

Neal scoffed and crossed his arms. "Why is everyone getting involved? I'm just doing this to mess with Peter."

"Neal sit down, listen to the rest of what I have to say, and most of all, stop lying to me."

"I'm not-"

"Kid, I've known you since you were fourteen. You may not have a tell, but I can still read you like an open book."

Neal sighed and sat down, waiting for his friend to continue.

"Neal, ever since he started to investigate you, all you did was play around and acted like a teenager rebelling against his father." Neal just gave him a look. "Well, minus the father part. Although you have had The Suit _unknowingly_ fill in that part until a couple weeks ago. Mrs. Suit finally broke and connected the dots for him." 

"I don't see Peter as a father."

"Neal, what did I just say about lying? And I talked to Elizabeth this morning, like I mentioned before, and she told me about yesterday, including what happened at work and last night." Mozzie got up and retrieved the wine, pouring himself a glass.

"How-"

Mozzie sat back down and took a sip. "Apparently Suit and Mrs. Suit talked while you were in dreamland."

"Whatever." Neal went to the couch and turned the TV on.

Mozzie sighed and turned around to see what he was watching. "Really?" He questioned flatly. "Don't tell me you're going to go through another Big Brother binge." 

"You're the one that had me watch this in the first place."

"Yeah, when you were fourteen, and to teach you peoples tells."

"Did you know that Mike Boogie is back?" Neal deflected. "He's only a coach in this season but there have been rumors that the coaches can enter the game later as players."

Mozzie sighed again as he realized that Neal was completely into the show and went over to join him on the couch. "So tell me more about these coaches this season."

Neal grinned and went into detail about the twist this year. Mozzie nodded and only half listened as he got lost in thought.

~line break*

It was lunch time and Neal was eating with Diana and Jones in the abandoned conference room. Diana just finished explaining her plans with her girlfriend for the Fourth of July and turned to Jones.

"So Jones, what are you doing for the Forth?" Diana asked and then took a bite of her salad.

"Just going to my sister's upstate, I haven't seen my nephew in ages. What about you Caffrey? Got a hot date planned?"

Neal laughed. "You could say that. I'm going to a little celebration with Peter and El that their neighbor is throwing."

"How did you manage that?" Jones asked. Peter was notorious around the office for never wanting to go to parties.

Another voice spoke from the doorway. "Are you sure you want to open that can of worms?" All three turned to see Peter with a brown bag, most likely containing a deviled ham. He closed the door so no wandering ears could hear the tale. He sat at the head of the table, Diana and Jones to his right and Neal to his left.

Neal studied the other man. "You're letting me tell them?" He clarified.

Peter shrugged. "Either way you're going to find a way to tell them. I just want to be here to make sure the facts don't get," Peter paused as he tried to think of a word. "Twisted." Peter leaned back and took out, sure enough, a deviled ham and took a bite. "Please, continue."

Neal looked him up and down, trying to find his angle in this. "Okay... Well," Neal started a little distracted but got more confident when he looked back at the other two waiting FBI agents. "We had just gotten to Peter's place when an older lady came up to Peter and started chatting, asking about a party she was throwing and if the three of us could go. The end." Neal looked at his watch. "Wow look at the time, mail frauds aren't going to solve themselves." Neal started to get up but was stopped.

"Neal, sit. Twisted facts remember, and my watch says there's still ten minutes of lunch left. Explain to them the assumption that you conned her into thinking."

Neal sat back down. "Conned is such a strong word,"

"Neal..." Peter warned.

"I conned her into thinking that Peter's my father." He said rushed. "But in my defense she assumed I was his son from the beginning." Peter glared at him. "I just never corrected her. And didn't let Peter correct her."

The two agents laughed, slowly at first but as the news settled they laughed harder.

When Jones finally caught his breath he asked another question to Neal. "So you have to spend the whole evening calling Peter Dad?"

Neal nodded and Diana asked this time. "She thinks that El is old enough to have an adult son?"

"Neal took care of that,"

Neal joined in with Peter's explanation. "We're just gonna say I'm Peter's from when he was nineteen." Neal then added with a stage whisper. "He got a little wild his freshmen year in college." Neal then went back to his normal voice. "He raised me on his own then when he went to Quantico his parents watched me. After he met El, me, along with her 'signs', convinced him to ask her out-"

Peter cut him off. "I think we all get the idea." He then asked. "Did you think of that all right now?"

Neal grinned. "Right on the spot."

Peter rolled his eyes and shook his head with a smile. He then ruffled Neal's hair as he got up, sandwich finished. "Five more minutes then go do that mail fraud you were talking about earlier."

Neal sighed and Jones left with Peter, patting his shoulder as he left. Now alone, Neal and Diana's eyes met.

"So that's your way of telling Peter?" Diana spoke up first. Neal groaned and left.

*line break~

Peter and El were in their room getting ready for the party. El was fixing her jewelry in the mirror while Peter was putting on his tie.

"Do we have to go? It's not too late to call and say we can't make it." Peter was still trying to get out of it. El went over and took his tie and put another on him.

"Yes, we are still going."

"Well I'm not exactly thrilled to spend the whole evening with Neal calling me Dad in front of everyone."

El straightened his jacket and gave him a kiss. "I think you'll survive the night. Besides just think of it as a sting or better yet, you'll be the boss of him all night."

Peter smiled a little. "I like that last part."

"Eww. PDA." They separated and turned to see Neal standing in their doorway. Then they laughed when they saw his hat. It was a straw fedora with an American flag pattern wrapped around the band. "What?" He smiled, knowing exactly what they were laughing at.

"Sweetie, where did you find that hat?" El giggled.

"Mozzie found it and got it for me."

Peter kissed El again to bother Neal and he made a face. As they walked down the stairs Peter thought of something. "What is the little guy doing tonight? First off, is it legal?"

"Not sure, he doesn't celebrate. Said something about-"

Peter cut him off before he could explain. "Forget I asked." Peter then held up El's coat for her to put on. He then turned to Neal. "Do I need to help you tie your shoes?"

"Funny." Peter laughed at Neal's face and put his hand on the back of his neck, this time without the death grip.

As they walked down the street, the house was only a couple houses down, Peter was drilling Neal. "Now I want you to _behave_. I know it's a hard concept for you to comprehend but you need to be on your best behavior. And whatever I tell you to do, you do it. No arguing, no complaining."

"Alright, alright already. Calm down _Dad_." Peter tightened his grip a little on Neal's neck.

"Ow! Mooom!" El sighed and smiled a little then went and stood between them, gripping Peter's arm and rubbing Neal's back.

"Can you two get along for one night?"

They looked at each other past Elizabeth. "No." They said at the same time.

El sighed again, expecting that, and thought, _'This is going to be a long night...'_

~line break~

At the party, Neal behaved himself for the most part at the beginning. Peter staying near him the whole time to keep an eye on him and one of the down sides of that being he had to hear 'the story of Neal's life' told about a hundred times.

"-I was pretty sad when Dad left for Quantico for four years, but I got to see him for Christmas every year and he would call almost every single night to say goodnight to me." Peter suppressed a groan when all the wives awed in the little circle that had formed in the backyard.

"Peter yer wife never mentioned yer this _sweet_." Mrs. Applebee spoke for everyone.

"Yes, he has his moments." El said sweetly while rubbing his shoulder.

"So Peter, ya mentioned the two of ya work together. Is Neal an agent too?"

Peter laughed and shook his head. "No, he's just a consultant."

"Ohhh what do ya consult in? And are ya gonna be an agent like yer Dad here?"

"I help out with the art side of things," Neal kept it vague. "And I think I'm just going to stay as a consultant. Being a full agent would be, a little too much." Neal unconsciously rubbed his tracker with his right leg slightly.

Peter laughed. "Yeah, the world might implode if Neal had a badge." He then turned to El. "You want another drink?"

She handed him the empty glass. "Sure, thanks hon."

"I'll help." Neal jumped in and went to the table where the food and drinks were. "Why couldn't you take my tracker off for this? What if someone sees it?" Neal muttered while grabbing a plate and putting food on it. "It's not like I'm gonna run. Plus you're making me stay by your side all night anyway."

"No Neal, I told you back at home, it's just a party. I'm not taking your anklet off. Now cowboy up. We're only going to be here for about another hour."

"But-"

"Hey, what did I say on the way here? No arguing." Peter handed Neal one of the glasses to hold while he got a plate and started to pile food on. "Think you can handle it?"

"No." Peter gave him 'the look' as he turned back to the group. "But I'll try for another hour. Any longer though and I'll fake a headache or something."

Peter smiled. "Thank you. And don't worry," Peter muttered the next part. "Any longer and _I'll_ take care of the 'or something'. Hughes did say to have my phone near me in case something comes up." Peter winked and Neal grinned back.

*line break*

About an hour later the three were walking home. Peter and El were hand in hand and Neal to the right of Peter. "That was fun." Neal broke the silence. "It would have been better if _someone_ would have taken my tracker off though."

"Just wait two years and you can go to all the parties you want without it."

"You know, it _was_ only a couple hours and he was with you all evening." El took Neal's side of the argument.

"Thank you! See Peter-"

"No Neal. That's not a fashion accessory that can be taken off whenever you feel like it." Peter unlocked the door and Neal groaned as they walked in. 

"Wow Peter, you don't trust me for a couple hours?"

"Well that's how dads are, but I guess that's also a new concept for you." Peter regretted his wording the moment the words left his mouth. "Neal, I didn't mean it like that-"

But it was already too late. "No, that's exactly what you meant. I'm the kid that grew up on his own. Well you know what Peter, screw you." Neal ran upstairs and Peter flinched when Neal slammed the door. Peter then went to go follow but was stopped by El grabbing his hand.

"Just let him go for now. It won't do either of you any good if you guys just start screaming at each other. Come to the kitchen, I'll make you a pot of coffee."

As El prepared the coffee Peter leaned against the kitchen island. "What is wrong with me? It seems like every time I'm finally getting along with that kid I end up saying something to screw it up."

El turned around and put her arms around his waist. "There is nothing wrong with you." She said firmly. "And in a way you were right with Neal, from what you told me he never did have his father in his life. This is a new thing for _both_ of you."

"I guess you're right." Peter said weakly.

"Of course I'm right."

"If you're so good why don't you go and talk for me?"

El gave Peter a kiss. "Sorry, that's your job dad."

Peter sighed. "It was worth a try."

~line break~

About an hour later Peter figured that Neal had enough time to cool off so he knocked on his door. "Neal, can I come in?" He asked from outside his door.

"I don't care, it's not like I have a choice anyway." Peter entered and found Neal on his bed changed and with a sketch pad propped up on his knees as he drew. He closed the door softly and sat at the foot of the bed.

"Neal, buddy, I didn't mean it like that. And I think you know that."

"So?"

Neal kept drawing and Peter sighed while rubbing the kid's knee. "I also think this is the first time you've had someone telling you what to do. Am I getting close?"

The younger man never looked up but still answered with a quiet maybe. "Neal look at me." He glanced up then went right back to his drawing. Peter quirked a little smile at that. "And continue looking at me." He clarified. "How old were you when you ran away?"

"How old do you think I was?" Neal countered.

"Young, younger than you lead everyone else to think."

Neal started to study the pencil in his hand. "Let me just start with everything I told you before was true. How I met Mozzie, everything."

"So Mozzie knows? Wait, why am I asking that? Of course Mozzie knows." Neal finally smiled. "Hey, turns out you do remember how to smile. Now kiddo, how old were you?"

Neal sighed and finally answered the question of the hour. "I was thirteen."

"Thirteen!?" Peter was beyond shocked.

"Yep," Neal popped the p. "My thirteenth birthday to be exact. I traveled around, worked my way up to New York, and by the time I had made it and found a place to settle in I was fourteen and had met up with Moz."

"Who having grown up on the streets himself had sympathized with you." Peter finished.

"Gee, it's like you're an investigator or something."

"Scoot over general sarcasm." Peter scooted next to Neal on the twin bed and he laughed.

"You're too big!"

Peter threw his arm around Neal and held him close. "There. You're little anyway."

Neal took a deep breath. "Mozzie said that this, _thing_ , with you, that's it's good for me. And that I have as he said 'daddy issues'" Neal did air quotes.

Peter laughed out loud at that last part. "Oh you have issues all right."

"Now who's general sarcasm?"

"Fine, what were you drawing? A picture of me hanging over a pool with alligators in it?"

"No, but I'll have to remember that one for some other time." The older man glared down at the kid in his arm. "It's just a sketch of Satchmo from the other night."

"Wow, Neal this is really good! You should start selling, getting your work out there. Or at least your _original_ work."

Neal just shrugged. "I used to, back when I was thirteen. I would go to a town for a bit and sell on the streets, sometimes even a portrait right on the spot. It helped that I looked younger cuz some people would give me extra money."

"Then why did you start forging?"

"Why does anyone start? Because I could. I found out I could make a week, sometimes a month's if I was lucky, worth of money with just one piece. It was amazing."

"It also got you that anklet."

"At least this model doesn't chafe as much."

Peter chuckled and shook his head. "Hey Peter?" Peter hummed. "Not that I'm complaining, but why are you still here? Hiding from El?" He joked about the last part but when Peter didn't answer he asked again. "Wait, you're seriously hiding from El? Why?"

"After every party El get's all, weird. She gives me a whole commentary of what happened, like, 'Did you hear what this person said?' and 'I heard that so-and-so is cheating, can you believe that?' and I don't even remember half of the people she's talking about."

"So you spend a couple hours of nodding and hoping she doesn't ask you what you think in detail?"

"Exactly! And who cares if this person is cheating? It's not like it involves me!"

"You can stay here then, but if El asks I'm not going to lie for you."

"You mean the one time it's ok to lie, you decide to tell the truth?" Peter felt his forehead. "You don't feel warm so you can't be sick, who are you and what have you done with Neal?"

Neal smacked his hand away. "Hardy har har." He then leaned more into Peter and closed his eyes.

"Oh no, we're not going to have a repeat of last time are we?"

"Well I'm tired. You can always go downstairs with El and talk about who's cheating on who." Neal opened one eye with a smirk.

"I guess subbing as your pillow is the lesser of the two evils."

"Good choice." The kid yawned. "You make a very good pillow. But I'm still telling El that you don't want to know all the neighborhood gossip."

"In that case," Peter started to get up but Neal latched onto his side like a leach.

"Joking." Peter settled back in with a smile. Neal closed his eyes again and went to dreamland. Peter took the sketch off his lap and placed it on the nightstand. He then reached out turned off the lamp, the room filling with darkness.

_line break_

At the office Monday morning the duo got off the elevator and entered the White Collar Unit. They walked up to Diana's desk and she smiled in greeting.

"Hey, you two have fun at the party?"

 They looked at each other with a smile. "Let's just say we found some middle ground." Peter answered for the both of them.

"And how was the date?" Neal asked.

 "Amazing. And no, you're not getting any details."

Neal snapped his fingers. "Damn. Well, what about you Jones?"

The man in question just growled in replay. "Sorry I asked?" He turned to Diana. "What's up with him?"

"He just spent the whole weekend watching My Little Pony. Turns out his nephew is a bronie." Diana clarified for the two.

Peter gave a sympathetic look while Neal grinned. "The new one, Friendship is Magic?"

All three heads turned to Neal in confusion. "What?" He shrugged. "I watch it from time to time when I'm baby-sitting June's granddaughter. She loves the show, and it's not that bad." All three snorted with laughter.

"Good job Caffrey, you've just made your nickname princess _even more_ fitting." The other two laughed some more at Diana's comment.

"Laugh all you want, you guys are the ones missing out."

Jones shook his head. "Not on this one man." Neal just rolled his eyes and went to his desk to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't knock My Little Pony 'til you've watched it. My friend made me watch an episode and it was surprisingly good and entertaining.   
> Rainbow Dash For the Win!!


	8. High on what?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two quick shout-outs, first to Devoregirl for being this stories 50th follower!  
> The next one to Frubeto who is translating this story into German for the German fanfic site!! Thank you again soooo much!!  
> Now to the chapter called:  
> High on what?

Diana, who came in early to catch up on paperwork, looked up to see Neal walk off the elevator and to say he was acting strange would be an understatement. He had his arms crossed and he was subtly having his eyes darting around the room as if he was waiting for something to happen. Even though his hands were in white knuckled fists, she could still see they were shaking a bit. As he got closer she also saw there were bags under his eyes and they were bloodshot.

"Hey Caffrey." She greeted cautiously.

He jumped at her voice then nodded in greeting and gave a weak smile but it quickly vanished as he sat down at his desk and his eyes started darting around again. Diana, getting a little worried about the out of character CI who was always cool under pressure, got up and went up to Peter's office. Knocking on his open door she poked her head in.

"Hey boss, you got a minute?"

Peter looked up from his computer. "Sure, what's up?"

Diana closed the door and walked closer to his desk. "I was just wondering, has Neal... um, do you know if," Diana stuttered

"Do I know if Neal has ever done what?" Peter prompted his agent to speak.

"Do you know if Neal has ever done drugs?" She finally spit out.

Peter was speechless for a moment. Then he started to laugh. "Neal? We are thinking of the same Neal, right? He's the last person I'd know to be doing drugs."

"I know, and I thought the same thing until I just saw him a second ago."

Peter sobered up instantly. "Why, what's wrong with him?"

"Well-" Diana started to explain but was cut off by a scream. The two ran out of the office and looked down at the bullpen. Everyone was staring at Neal who was no longer sitting where Diana left him, but was backed up against the wall behind his desk. He was shaking more and was staring at Jones.

"Sorry man, I didn't mean to scare you like that."

Neal took a deep breath but kept shaking. "It's fine. I'm fine."

"Neal!" He jumped and eeped at Peter's voice. Looking over at the balcony he saw him giving him the double finger point. "My office." He continued in a calmer voice and Neal nodded. Peter turned to Diana. "Thanks for telling me about this and could you-"

"-keep the theory to myself? Already planned to."

"It's like you read my mind." He turned to Neal who just arrived. "Come on kid." Putting a hand on his shoulder, he led the shaking young man into his office and shut the door. He told him to sit down but he just shook his head. "No you don't want to sit or no you can't sit?"

Neal started to pace back and forth restlessly. "No I just don't feel like sitting."

"Then at least stand still." Peter grabbed his shoulders and held him still. Looking a little closer he noticed something about his eyes. "Neal, why are your eyes dilated?"

"What do you mean?"

"Neal, you once told me you never lied to me and I want you to remember that when you answer my next question."

"Okay?"

"Neal," Peter took a deep breath and continued. "Are you doing drugs?"

"What, god no Peter, why would you think-"

"Kiddo I'm not mad if you are, just know you can tell me. I can find you help-"

Neal shrugged the older man's hands off his shoulders and backed up. "Peter, out of everyone, why would you ever think I'm on drugs?!"

"Well let's see, you can't focus on one thing for more than two seconds before your eyes dart to another part of the room, they're bloodshot, you haven't stopped shaking once. Neal-"

Neal growled and ran his hands threw his hair. "Peter please listen to me!" He then pointed to himself. "I'm. Not. High! I've never been high in my life and I've never even _thought_ about getting high!"

Peter was starting to get annoyed. "Neal I don't want you to start lying to me now. Please just tell me the truth."

Neal scoffed and brushed past Peter. Peter grabbed him by the crook of the arm and noticed that his pulse was much faster than normal. "Where do you think you're going?"

Neal yanked his arm out of the other's grip and stormed out of the office. He ran down the stairs and stopped at Peter's voice at the top of the stairs. "Neal! Answer me this instant!"

 Neal spun around and glared. "Why should I tell you? You're just gonna claim it's a lie! Just check my stupid tracker!" With that he went to the elevator and slipped in right as the door closed.

Peter went to follow but stopped when he heard Hughes outside his office. "Burke! My office!" Peter swore under his breath and followed his boss. Hughes sat back down behind his desk while Peter chose to stand. "Now what's going on with Caffrey?"

"Sir, to tell you the truth, I have no idea."

"Listen Peter, I know the two of you have been getting closer recently but I can't have him going off the hinge like that. You need to start controlling your CI or I'm going to have no choice but to reassign him to another handler or worst yet, send him back for the remainder of his sentence."

Peter did a double-take. "You can't do that."

"And I don't want to, but that cannot happen again. I want you to go put a stop to it now."

"Does that mean?"

Hughes nodded. "Go after him Peter."

Peter released the breath that he hadn't realized he was holding. "Thank you sir." He left the office and went to Diana's computer. "Can you-"

"He's at Central Park. It looks like he's on the shore of The Pond. He hasn't moved for a while now."

"Thanks, call me if he moves."

Diana nodded. "Got it boss."

~line break~

Peter parked at the edge of the park and walked to the small lake. Looking around for about five minutes he finally spotted someone in a nice suit sitting at the edge of the lake. His head kept drooping as if he was falling asleep and it looked like the only thing keeping him awake was the movement from him throwing pebbles into the water, the little plops heard from where Peter was.

He walked up to him, still going unnoticed, and spoke to announce his presence. "Hey buddy," He put his hand on the other's shoulder and crouched down to his level. The second he did that Neal screamed and threw a fist while spinning around. Peter grabbed his fist with ease but lost his balance and fell backwards, pulling Neal's arm with him. "Whoa, calm down, it's just me!"

"Peter? Is that you?" Peter sat up and studied Neal. The bags under his eyes were a lot more noticeable and he kept blinking, trying to focus his sight or to just stay awake, Peter wasn't quite sure which or if it was a mix of the two. His pulse was slowing down from what he could tell from him holding Neal's wrist.

"Damn kid." He muttered under his breath. "What's wrong with you?"

Neal snatched his hand back and turned around. "Why should I tell you? You're just-"

"Don't start that again." Peter scooted up next to him.

"You're the one that doesn't trust me." Neal wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his chin on his knees.

"Well you've been acting more paranoid than Mozzie all morning. If you have an explanation for that that doesn't involve drugs I'd love to hear it."

"Will you not jump to conclusions?"

Peter lifted his hand and ran it through Neal's hair. He then pulled the kid to him and wrapped an arm around him, running his hand up and down his arm. "I promise I will not jump to any conclusions."

"Well it all started when Moz came over last night-"

Peter interrupted him with a groan. "It all started with Mozzie. Why am I surprised."

"Anyway," He continued with his story. "He told me about this game he found called Slender."

"Slender as in Slender Man from those old folk-lord tales?"

"The same. You go around a forest in the middle of the night looking for eight pages before he gets you. You only have a limited amount of time because your flashlight slowly dims and once it goes out-"

"-He gets you?"

"Yep. I thought it would be easy but looks are deceiving. I was up the whole night trying to beat it and half the time I was quitting because it was so scary."

"That explains why you can barely keep your eyes open and the paranoia but that still doesn't explain why you were shaking, your eyes being dilated, and you couldn't sit still earlier."  

"Well I was really tired by around two a.m. so instead of going to bed-"

"Like a normal person." Neal elbowed him and he grunted. "Sorry, I'm done."

"Like I was saying, I didn't want to sleep so I may have had a couple of Monsters from the drug store on the corner."

Peter squinted. "And how many is 'a couple'?"

"Now remember what you said back in the office about not getting mad." Neal tried to cushion the blow.

"How many?" Peter asked firmly.

"Um, four-ish?" He squeaked.

"Four- _ish_? How much is 'ish' in that brain of yours?" Peter lightly tapped his head.

"About three fourths of the can. Are you mad because-"

"No, I said I wouldn't get mad." Neal relaxed but stiffened when Peter continued. "I'm upset, annoyed, flabbergasted, angry. But no, I'm not mad. What the hell were you thinking?! I'm surprised your heart didn't explode! Do you know how bad for you those are?!"

Neal shrank into Peter. "I know, I know-" His voice came out muffled.

"Then why in the world did you do it?" Peter asked, calmer this time.

"I don't know, I wasn't thinking."

"There's one thing we agree on." Peter sighed and just held Neal to him for a couple of minutes. His breathing started to even out and he went lax against Peter. "Hey," He shook him. "I don't mind you sleeping on me but I cross the line to you sleeping in the park."

"But I'm _really_ tired," Neal moaned. "And my head hurts."

"That's because you're crashing big time. Come on," Peter stood up and pulled Neal with him. "You are not going back to the office like this. Satchmo would be more helpful than you in this condition."

Neal groaned. "This is worst than being hung over."

Peter chuckled and put his hand on the back his neck to lead him to the car and to make sure he didn't fall over. "I bet kiddo." They reached the car quickly and Neal leaned his head against the cool glass inside.

"Hey Peter?"

Peter hummed in acknowledgement as he turned to check for cars before turning onto the main road.

"I have a confession to make. Back at the office I did lie about one thing."

Peter glanced at him. "And that would be?"

"I may have, once when I was fifteen, gotten high."

"You've done drugs? You? What was it?" Peter tried to stay calm but was failing miserably at it.  

"It was weed and it was one time. Mozzie caught me and I got in _sooo_ much trouble."

"Remind me to thank him for at least keeping you off drugs. And if we're making confessions right now, but first, what you hear in this car, stays in this car. Are we clear on that?"

"Yeah?" Neal smiled a little and lifted his head up.

"I may have smoked weed _once_ my freshmen year in college."

"Peter!" Neal exclaimed in shock. "You?! Mr. Straight-lase, never broken a rule in his life, smoked pot?!" 

"Hey!" Peter held up one finger. "It was one time and I never did it again!"

"So I was right, you were wild when you were nineteen!"

"I thought you had a headache?"

Neal refused to replay to that and turned his head to look out the window. "Hey, why are we going to your place?" He deflected.

"Because I am going to work from there and make sure you sleep."

Neal scoffed. "I don't need a baby-sitter."

Peter pretended to think for a second. "Um, In case that Monster caused some memory loss and you've forgotten everything that has happened, yes you do."

"What about your case files?"

"Going to call Diana as soon as we get back and ask to bring them over."

"But-"

"Nope, sorry Neal. You're not getting out of this one."

Neal sighed and hit his head against the window.

~line break~

As soon as they got home and Peter unlocked the door he shoved Neal lightly towards the stairs. "Go get changed." He then pulled out his phone and called Diana.

She answered on the second ring. _"Hey boss, I'm assuming you have him?"_

"Yeah and the good news is he is not on drugs, so I dodged a bullet there."

_"Then what was wrong?"_

"He decided to pull an all-nighter and get hyped up on Monsters. He's crashed now and I don't want to leave him alone. Can you do me a favor and bring me my case files to work from home?"

_"Sure thing, need anything else?"_

"Nope, thanks so much Diana, you're a lifesaver."

 _"No problem. See you in twenty."_ She hung up and Peter sighed.

He went up stairs and knocked on Neal's door. "Hey buddy?" He poked his head in and smiled. Neal had managed to get into his PJ's but didn't quite make it under the covers. He had one arm under his pillow and the other over Satchmo who had decided to take a nap curled up to one of his favorite people. Peter grabbed one of the blankets that was draped on the chair in the room and put it over the two. He then turned off the light and shut the door.

Going downstairs, he collapsed on the couch and grabbed the paper. Turning it to the sports section he read while waiting for Diana.

~line break~

Fifteen minutes later there was a knock on his door and he opened it to find Diana holding a box of files. "Hey, sleeping beauty upstairs?"

Peter stepped aside to let her in and nodded. "Out like a light." Diana chuckled and set the box down on the coffee table. "Come with me, you gotta see this." Peter almost sounded giddy when he said that.

They went upstairs and Peter slowly opened the door but didn't turn on the light. Diana was shocked, considering she was so used to seeing Neal with all his shields up. At some point he had curled closer to Satch and had his head laying on top of the dog and had wrapped his other arm around him.

Peter closed the door again and leaned against it.

"He looks so," Diana struggled to find the right word.

"Young?" Peter guessed.

"Yeah." Peter led her downstairs.

"Not exactly the face of a hardened criminal."

"It's hard to believe he was able to avoid the FBI for six years." Diana pointed out and opened the door. "See ya tomorrow boss."

"Bye, and thanks again."

Peter shut the door and got to work on the couch.

~line break~

Neal came shuffling down the stairs with the blanket wrapped around him. "Is that pizza I smell?"

"Yep, it should be ready in a couple of minutes." Peter finished typing something on his laptop.

Neal collapsed next to him on the couch and used him to sit upright. "Yay, cardboard pizza."

Peter set the laptop up on the coffee table. "If you don't want pizza I'm pretty sure I have a can of deviled ham open in the fridge."  

Neal yawned and made a face. "The flavored cardboard is good."

"Glad I was able to satisfy your delicate taste buds." The oven dinged and Peter ruffled his hair while getting up. Neal just laid down where Peter was. He must have dosed off because the next thing he knew he was being shaken awake by Peter. "Come on, up. You have to eat something and I need to sit down."

Neal sat up and looked at the coffee table. There was a plate with a piece of pizza on it. Next to it was a glass of orange juice while Peter had a beer in his hand. "Why do I have to have juice while you get a beer?" He asked but still drank the juice.

"Yes, because I'm going to give alcohol to someone that nearly ODed on energy drinks this morning."

Neal started to eat his pizza and rolled his eyes. "Okay. No need for the sarcasm. What time is it anyway?"

"About five. Now would you care explaining why you pulled a stunt like that that even most seventeen year olds would consider stupid."

Neal placed the empty plate, except for the crust, down on the coffee table and folded his legs up on the couch. He paused and studied the blanket, picking at a loose thread. After a couple of moments he started to speak slowly, picking his words carefully. "Because it _is_ something seventeen year olds do, staying up all night playing a cool game. When I was seventeen I was pretending to be some twenty-one year old and had to deal with stuff that adults worry about."

Peter started to put the pieces together. "You never got the chance to be a teenager and get to do the average stuff like playing video games." He guessed and Neal nodded. Peter pulled him close and sighed. "I can't imagine not being able to just goof off as a teenager."

"I can't imagine you as a teenager period." Neal threw in with a smirk and Peter gave a fake glare. The door unlocked and Elizabeth walked in, interrupting the two.

"Hon, are you home? I saw the car outside. Oh hi Neal, are you feeling alright?" El came in and immediately started to mother hen him.

Peter answered for him. "This one decided it would be a good idea to have about five energy drinks at two in the morning."

El gasped and looked to Neal. "I was playing a game." He gave his kicked puppy look to her.

She thought for a second. "Was it that slender game Mozzie was telling me about?" She sounded angry and Neal nodded. "How far did you get? Because I was only able to get three pages." Both Neal and Peter looked up sharply and looked confused.

She shrugged. "What? He had me play it and it was fun."

Peter rolled his eyes and Neal grinned. "I had seven out of the eight pages and I _saw_ the last one in the distance and then he got me!"

Peter shook his head and got up as the two continued to trade stories. El took his seat and he took up the plates to the kitchen. When he came back the duo were on his computer. "What are you two doing?" He asked suspiciously. 

They looked up and tried to give the most innocent faces. "Peter if you just give it a try-" Neal tried to speak.

"No." He closed the laptop shut and Neal groaned. Peter grabbed his arm and pulled him up. "To the table with you, I want you to eat some more."

"But Peter, I don't want any more cardboard. I already ate a piece."

"Too bad. This is the first real food you've probably had in the last twenty-four hours and I want you to at least eat another slice." Neal was being dragged to the table and he looked back at Elizabeth.

'Help me.' He mouthed and she just laughed and shook her head.

'Sorry.' She mouthed back. He sighed and let himself be set at the table.

"You know Peter, I don't think this counts as real food." The two kept up their light banter up until they went to watch TV at which point El cut in and threatened them both to shut up so they got quiet real fast.

~line break~

In the morning Neal came down in his suit and sat down next to Peter at the table with a relaxed sigh. Peter set down the paper and studied Neal. "You look better." He commented.

"I feel better. I think all of it is out of my system now."

"Good, you have enough energy as it is. You do not need the help of energy drinks for that."

El walked up behind him from the kitchen and set a plate in front of him. "Hi sweetie." She then went around the table and sat down across from the boys with her food. They all started to eat and El kept looking at Peter to say something. Peter refused to and was silently giving El the 'no you do it' look. Neal swallowed and watched unnoticed as the two had their silent argument.

"Will one of you speak already?" Neal asked when he realized they were going to be there all day at the rate they were going.

"Well," El spoke first. " Peter and I talked last night and well, honey tell him what we thought of."

Peter choked slightly and swallowed. "Um, well, we were thinking, if you want to you don't have to, that you could," He paused as he trailed off.

Neal was starting to get impatient. "Words Peter, use your words."

He rushed out the next part. "That you can sleep over once a week." He then slowed down as he explained. "You could keep clothes here and like on a Friday you could come here with me after work and go home on Saturday afternoon or something. That way if you feel the need to be an idiot again, which we all know you're going to do something stupid at some point, we'll be around."

Peter finished and tried to study Neal's face but it was completely unreadable. After a couple of minutes later Neal spoke slowly, unsure of what to stay. "So, would that include Elizabeth's cooking and if she's not here we get take-out?" He then broke into a smile. "Because that pizza was really bad." Peter rolled his eyes and took his plate up.

"Don't worry about that," El then stage whispered. "I hated that pizza too."

Peter glared. "Trader. Neal, go get ready for work, you have a lot to catch up on since you were sleeping away the day yesterday."

Neal turned around in his seat to look at Peter. "I just have one condition." Peter set down the kitchen towel and gave Neal his full attention.

"And that is?"

"You have to play-"

Peter cut him off when he realized what Neal was going to say. "I'm not playing that stupid game."

"But Peter, you have to, just once-"

Peter stuck his ground. "No. Now go get ready."

Neal sighed and went upstairs. Peter turned back to the sink and El came up and hugged him from behind. "You can't just try it?"

"Not you too." Peter groaned and turned around in her arms. "I don't want to play that silly game."

El pouted. "Please? It was his only condition and he has his mind set on this." She kissed him and gave him puppy eyes that rivaled Neal's.

He sighed. "Fine. _One time_ , that's it."

She grinned and kissed him. "Thank you!"

Neal came in with his messenger bag. "Really? Get a room."

Peter just walked past him. "My house, these _are_ my rooms. Plus I'm playing that stupid game of yours so be good or I'll change my mind."

Neal looked at El in shock. "Okay, how did you do that?"

El just smiled knowingly and left. Neal just looked to Peter speechless. "That's why I married her." He simply said and guided Neal to the door.

In the car Peter picked up the conversation. "So I'm assuming it's a yes."

"Your offer? Yeah, it'd be cool. But Peter just answer me one question."

"I already said yes to playing your game."

Neal gave a mock glare. "Not that. Why are you letting me stay over? And don't give me that BS answer you did before."

"The thing is Neal, that wasn't a BS answer." Neal gave a confused look and Peter clarified. "We really do want you to be able to just let go once in a while. Also-"

"I knew it!"

"No listen, this is serious." Neal nodded and grew serious. Peter continued. "After your big exit yesterday morning Hughes told me something."

"What?"

"You can't be popping off like that. I know you're rarely like that but he said if it does happen again they're either going to find you a new handler or," Peter let it hang there but Neal finished for him.

"Or I'm back inside?" Peter nodded and Neal sighed. "Then I guess I have to behave now."

"Good guess kid. Although you should already be behaving." Peter glanced at him.

He shrugged and smirked. "Then behave better." He amended. "Or just be better at not getting caught." Peter shook his head with a smile and reached over blindly to pat his shoulder. 

"Why don't you just stick with the first plan there buddy."

"We'll see."

Peter had a bad feeling about that. At least now he can keep an eye on him once a week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slender is a real game that is probably the scariest game ever! If you want to try just go to slendergame and download it free from that site! My new record is four out of the eight pages.


	9. Dinner Plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight spoilers for Veiled Threat if you squint.

One week later it was a Friday evening and Peter was working late, which in turn made Neal stay late. The younger man sighed again and grabbed a rubber band ball that was on Peter's desk. He started to throw it up and down then stopped and sighed again.

"Are you done yet?" He whined.

Peter glanced up from the form he was filling out. "You know what I say, if it happens in the field, it happens in the file. I'm just being throe."

Peter went back to work and Neal threw his head back and groaned.

After a couple of minutes Neal broke Peter's concentration again. "I'm bored. Can we switch seats so I can go on the computer at least?"

"No Neal, just sit there and be patient." Peter got back to work and ignored the kid.

"But you're not even using it!"

Peter stopped looking up at this point. "No talking."

He started to tap his feet for a little while. After awhile Peter noticed that the tapping was in a pattern. "And no Morse code." He added so Neal stopped and groaned. He got up and went to the other side of Peter's desk. "What are you doing?"

Neal didn't replay. He just opened a drawer and pulled out some saltines. He went back and sat down, munching on his snacks.

Peter just stared at him. "Unbelievable. You're using my desk as your own snack bar."

"I'm hungry," Neal defended himself. "And El said she was making lasagna."

"So it's not fun staying after because someone else is slacking."

Neal stared in disbelief. "So you stayed late here again to teach me a lesson?"

Peter was speechless and blinked. Neal grinned and started to laugh. The other agent just stood and put his coat on.

"Let's go kid or you can find your own ride home."

Neal followed to the elevator. "I can't believe _you're_ the agent that caught me. And I'm _so_ telling El about this."

"And then I'll tell her how you did at the auction. She's been dying to know." Peter pressed the down button.

Neal squinted. "You wouldn't." He said slowly.

"Why don't you test it and find out?" Peter commented as they entered the elevator.

Neal stuck out his hand. "Truce?" He offered.

"Truce." Peter shook his hand.

The door binged and Neal ran out into the garage. "Race you to the car!" He yelled over his shoulder. He then froze and turned to fully face Peter. "Wait, where did you park?"

Peter laughed and jogged in the opposite direction that Neal went in. He then spotted the car and dashed to it, passing Peter along the way.

"I win!" Peter reached the car second and was breathing heavily.

"How did you learn to run so fast?" He asked after he caught his breath and unlocked the car. Neal's smile vanished and he got in.

"School." He simply answered.

Peter started the car and drove off. Sensing something was up with his CI, he pushed a little harder. "Were you in track? I know you only went to Jr. High but they have track teams too."

"Nope. What about you?" Neal was deflecting and they both knew that but Peter let it slide for now, making a mental note to bring it up at a later time.

"I did baseball through Jr. High and High School; varsity team. I also did a little bit of basketball too."

Neal whistled. "Nice Peter, so you were one of the jocks? How did you pull that off while also being a mathlete?"

"I could ask you the same thing, human calculator." Peter joked.

Neal was dead serious when he answered. "I didn't." Their eyes met for a second as Peter took his eyes off the road and really looked at Neal. Peter had to look back at the road while Neal continued. "It started in about third grade and just got worse until I learned to either run or talk my way out of things."

"But you couldn't have been the only kid good at math, I mean a lot of kids are."

"Peter, I was a scrawny boy that had no father, liked to draw, was a nerd, had a mother that let's just say 'wasn't all there', I didn't like sports, should I go on?"

Peter parked and turned to Neal. "I didn't-"

"Whatever. It was a long time ago." Neal escaped the car and went inside. Peter sighed and got out.

`o` line break `o`

After dinner Neal ran straight upstairs to his room. "What's wrong with Neal?" El asked as she and Peter did the dishes.

"He, _implied_ some things about when he was a kid, and well, truthfully; he made it sound like hell."

El set down the dishrag. "What happened? What did he say?"

"Well, from what he told me, it sounded like he was bullied from third grade 'til he ran away at thirteen."

El gasped. "The poor baby."

"Should I go talk to him? El you know I'm bad at this stuff but-"

She cut off her husband with a kiss. "Hon, that is exactly what you should do. Look at those father instincts kick in."

"If only I did raise him." Peter muttered as he dried his hands and went upstairs. The door was opened a crack so Peter knocked lightly and poked his head in. Neal was sprawled on his stomach with his drawing pad in front of him. He was also watching the old TV that Peter brought up from the basement. "Are you watching-"

"Shhh! This is the new episode that I missed yesterday because of that case." Peter closed the door and waited patiently. When the ads started up Neal turned down the TV and sat up.

"You watch Glee?" Peter bit his lip to keep from laughing.

"Yes I do, and I don't care if you laugh, if you bite your lip anymore it's going to bleed."

Peter checked his lip for blood and Neal laughed. "So what are you drawing?" He went to look but Neal flipped the page before he could see.

"Nothing!"

Peter's interested perked up. "Come on, is it of a crush?"

Neal's face went red and he went on his stomach again and turned the TV back up. "The shows back. You can watch if you want."

"Why not, scoot." Neal scooted over and Peter sat on the edge of the bed. "So who's your favorite character?"

"Do you even know the characters?"

Peter pretended to be offended. "Of course I do."

Neal looked up at Peter and raised his brow.

"What? El watches this all the time."

Neal's eyes lit up. "El watches Glee!?"

"Yep, now favorite character."

Neal turned back to watch and answered a little calmer. "Kurt."

"Really? I see you more as a fan of Rachel. You both love the spot light, although Kurt does too if you think about it."

"What about you then, Mr. Critical?"

"Will Schuster."

Neal shook his head. "I see you more as Burt."

"And how does that brain of yours make _that_ connection?" Peter ruffled Neal's hair.

Neal refused to make eye contact with Peter. "Well he's a big sports guy for one. And he does things way outside his comfort zone to help his son Kurt feel better."

Peter smiled and ran his hand threw Neal's hair more. "Well if you put it that way," Peter glanced down and saw that Neal's sketch pad was within reach. He snatched it up and out of Neal's reach.

"Hey! Give it back!"

Peter jumped back off the bed and flipped the page to the drawing. When Neal saw that he was looking at it his face went red and he leaned back against the wall, folding his legs up. He crossed his arms on top of his knees and buried his face in his arms. After a moment Neal heard Peter exhale and felt the bed shift as he sat down and shuffled back against the wall with him.

Peter put his arm around Neal and just sat there with him for a minute. Peter was the first to break the silence. "Does anyone else know, besides Mozzie of course."

Neal kept his head buried. "Diana, we talked back when she was pretending to be a hooker."

"It explains why Kurt is your favorite."

Neal lifted his head and rested it on Peter's shoulder. "What can I say? He's a great dresser."

Peter laughed. "That he is, not many people could wear a hippopotamus broche and pull it off." He paused and continued in a more serious voice. "So you're, um,"

Neal chuckled at Peter's discomfort. "Bi? Yeah. You're not going to be all weird and uncomfortable now are you?" Neal asked a little worried.

Peter snorted. "No, you're still the same pain as you've always been."

"Thank you for that." Neal said sarcastically.

"No problem."

A second later Neal spoke again. "And, Kurt's strong. He doesn't care what anyone thinks of him, even after everything he went through. He never quit."

Peter realized something. "Is that one of the reasons you were bullied? Because you liked boys?"

He nodded and leaned even more into Peter, his fist clenched to Peter's shirt. "I was always picked on but normally I was able to shake it off. When I was twelve and started Jr. High, I started to like one of my friends. His name was Ryan and he was one of the only kids that was nice to me." Neal paused and took a breath. "I had this notebook where I would doodle in class and inside I had the basic drawings that people with crushes normally make."

"Like hearts around the name and such?"

Neal nodded. "Well I went to the bathroom and when I got back some kid had stolen it and passed it around the room. By the end of the day just about everyone in the school knew, including Ryan."

"I'm guessing he wasn't, how should I say this, excepting?"

Neal snorted. "Peter, this was St. Louis in the 80s. People weren't exactly 'out and proud'." Neal even went as far as using air quotes as he sat up.

"Neal, what did he do?" Peter growled and was afraid to hear the answer.

Neal looked down and started to pick at the comforter. "He beat me up then when I was on the ground spit on me and told me to never talk to him again."

Peter sighed and pulled Neal in a bone-crushing hug. He rested his chin on his head. "Oh kiddo, I'm so sorry."

Neal sniffed. "My best friend told me he hated me. Everyone did. They told me I was disgusting and unnatural and,and," Neal's speech sped up as he spoke until Peter stopped him.

"Hey, shh. Listen to me," Peter pulled Neal back and brushed his bangs back, revealing his red eyes. "You are _none_ of those things, and if that's the only thing they judged you on then _they_ are the disgusting and unnatural ones."

Neal smiled. "You sound just like my old history teacher Ms. Turner."

"Yeah? What was she like?"

"She was amazing. At my school, I was the only out student so I was targeted by bullies a lot. If I ever needed to talk she was there to listen and I would eat lunch with her every day in her classroom. Before I dropped out she said that when I entered High School she was going to start working up there too." Neal gushed.

"But then you left."

Neal frowned and nodded. "When I turned thirteen I was told about my father and that on top of school, I just... left." He shrugged.

"So you haven't seen her since then?" Neal shook his head and whipped the last of his tears. "Do you wish you could?"

Neal's eyes lit up. "Every single day. But I know I can't so no use feeling bad about it." Neal jumped off the bed. When he reached the door Peter finally questioned him.

"Where are you going?"

"To go see El. That way I can watch Glee with her and I know she'll keep you from talking through it." He then left and Peter spotted Neal's laptop on the nightstand. Grabbing it, he turned it on and went on the FBI database.

'o' line break 'o'

A couple days later Peter had Neal over for dinner. El was in the kitchen while Peter and Neal set the table. Neal did a quick count and noticed an extra plate. "Is someone else coming over? Or are you unable to do basic math anymore? Because if it's the latter you owe me twenty bucks."

"Haha, no. There's just going to be someone else joining us."

Neal set the last glass down. "Is that why you guys are having me over on a Tuesday? Not that I'm complaining. Do I know who's coming?"

"Let's just say you two will be very talkative." Peter said vaguely.

The doorbell rang and Peter went to get it while Neal went to help El in the kitchen. Neal stirred the spaghetti sauce then when El's back was turned stole some cheese out of the bowl. He almost choked when he heard a voice he thought he would never hear again in her New Jersey accent scold him. "Neal, and thought you would know better by now." With wide eyes he turned around slowly and saw his old history teacher. She was slightly older now, about in her mid-forties, and her short brown curly hair was now a little bit longer then shoulder length. He had one of the widest grins that Peter had ever seen and went to hug his old teacher.

Pulling back, but still holding onto his forearms, she got a better look at her former student. "Oh my gawd, Look at you, all grown up. You're taller than me now!"

Neal laughed. "I can't believe you're here, how-" He was speechless as he looked between Ms. Turner and Peter.

"Well, I may have did a search on the FBI database Friday night and through the weekend."

Neal smirked. "Peter, did you misuse FBI resources for personal matters? Because I happen to know that that's frowned upon."

Peter glared but the smile on his face ruined the effect. "Shush you."

Ignoring Peter, Neal turned back to Turner. "Did you fly all the way up from St. Louis?" Neal led her to the couch where they sat as Peter and El worked in the kitchen and gave them some space to catch up.

"No, I live down in Jersey again. Right across from the Hudson actually. Now a better question would be what happen to you? You just vanished one day out of thin air."

Peter, who was setting some bread on the table, but in. "Yeah, he tends to do that."

"Thank you for the commentary Peter." Neal said sarcastically. "You can go now."

Peter put his hands up in a surrendering motion and went back to the kitchen.

Ms. Turner chuckled at the two then got a little more serious as she turned to face him. "What happen to you?" She questioned again.

Neal sighed and thought for a second. "Truthfully, a lot. Long story short it ended with me taking a road less recommended and getting one of these." He lift his left pant leg and showed her the tracker. "Peter is the agent that caught me."

"Oh sweetheart," She gave him a hug, which shocked him.

"You don't hate me? You don't even know what I did." He asked when she pulled back.

"Did you ever hurt anyone?" He shook his head. "Then listen to me. I could never hate you. You may have made mistakes but everyone in life has at one time or another. They're what help you grow."

Neal smiled. "Thank you."

Peter poked his head out from the kitchen. "And let it be on record that I caught you three times."

"Hey, the last one didn't count. That was so you could catch Hagen and I could stay on as your CI."

"Just face it, you're not really good at the whole running thing." El came out of the kitchen carrying the pasta.

"Can you two ever just call a truce and bury the hatchet?"

They looked at each other then El. "No." They said at the same time. El rolled her eyes and looked at Ms. Turner.

"How do you stand being a teacher with a hundred kids a day? I can barely stand these two."

Neal and his former teacher got off the couch and made it to the table where Peter and El had just sat down. "I ask myself that every day." Then on a lighter note she asked. "Now what _did_ you do?"

"Well-" Neal started but Peter cut him off.

"What didn't he do would be a better question."

"But I was only ever convicted for bond forgery." Neal slid in.

"Allegedly, however, your file ranges from art theft to embezzling to, of course, forgeries." Peter pointed with his fork at Neal and smiled. "Neal was one of _the_ best con men of the 21st century." At that Neal took a sip of his wine to busy himself and looked away. "Now he's one of the best partners I've ever had." He looked back shocked and set the glass down. Peter, realizing how mushy that sounded, then killed the mood. "Until he has to fill out paperwork."

Neal rolled his eyes and everyone laughed. "That sounds like him back when he was in school. Neal is still probably one of the smartest kids I've ever taught but I could never get him to actually do the bookwork."

They laughed again and the dinner continued on without a hitch as they chatted. About an hour later, everyone had gathered in the living room to talk over coffee. (Italian roast, a gift from June)

Peter and El were on the couch, Ms. Turner on the recliner across from them, and Neal on the floor with Satchmo.

"What's his name?" She asked enthusiastically, looking at Satch.

Neal set his mug on the coffee table and started to pet him. "Satchmo. He's one of the best dogs ever." At that Satch licked him.

"Awww, I just got a puppy myself. He's only about 10 weeks old and just full of energy."

Peter smiled. "Don't let Neal near him. Satch is normally pretty calm until Neal shows up." To prove his point Satchmo barked playfully and pawed at Neal. Neal, luckily, was wearing casual clothes and not one of his suits. "Neal stop it, or he's going to be up all night."

Neal stopped and Satchmo whined a little at the loss of his play mate. "Sorry boy." Satch put his head in Neal's lap so he started to pet him calmly.

Ms. Turner broke the silence first. "So Neal, did you ever finish school?"

"I've been valedictorian before." He said vaguely.

"No, Ben Cooper was valedictorian, and we were the ones that made Cooper." Peter corrected him.

"Well I am Ben Cooper and it was in the year book with my picture."

"What school was it?" Peter shot back.

"Umm." Neal went quiet as he tried to remember the name of the school.

Peter smiled in victory. "That's what I thought." He got up and ruffled his hair affectionately as he passed and collected all the empty mugs to take to the kitchen.

"That proves nothing, I'm just having a laps in memory!" Neal called back belatedly.

"And I believe all of Mozzie's conspiracy theories." He said coming back into the room.

"Who's Mozzie?" Ms. Turner asked.

"He's a good friend of mine. I met him about a year after I ran away, he taught me how to survive out on the streets."

"Or in other words, his literal partner in crime."

Neal shrugged with a smile. "Well I want to meet this Mozzie one day, but right now I need to get going, classes to teach tomorrow." She stood up and everyone walked her to the door. Neal helped her put on her coat. "Thank you sweetie, it was so great seeing you again." She gave him a hug that he returned whole-heartedly. She released him and turned to Peter and El. "And I'm glad to have met you both. Thank you for the lovely meal, it was delicious."

"It was no problem, we should do this again some time." El spoke for her and Peter.

"Yes we should. And Neal, if you can't remember the name of that school, you should think about getting a GED in your name."

He hesitated for a split second but Peter was the only one to notice it. "I'll think about it."

"You better. Now don't be a stranger, call more often. If I have time I may be able to enter your radius so we can do this again." She winked at him and they said their farewells.

Neal closed the door and turned to go upstairs. "Is it okay if I stay the night?"

"Of course." El smiled and went to finish cleaning up in the kitchen.

"I'll help." He leaped off the step and went to follow but stopped at Peter's voice.

"Neal," He said warningly and when Neal turned back to him he was crooking his finger.

"Know what, I should just get going-"

"Sit." Peter cut him off.

"Yes sir." They sat down on the couch.

"Now are you really thinking about getting your GED?"

"Truthfully I'm not sure. It's not like I'm in a rush to get it. I still have two years left on the anklet."

"I know but-"

El poked her head out from the kitchen with almost a sixth sense for when Neal is uncomfortable. "Hon let him be, I need to borrow him." She then spoke to Neal. "Can you help me?"

He leaped up. "Yes!" He made it to the kitchen in record time. "Thank you."

"I figured you needed saving. Now since you're here, mind telling me how you did at the auction? Because I want to know how Peter was picked over you."

He sighed. "Knew this was too easy. First let me start by saying that this was all part of my plan."

Peter came up behind him. "I thought the plan was for the black widow to bid on you."

"Haha." He said sarcastically and splashed a little bit of the soapy water at him. Peter was not amused. Neal slowly started to back up. "Now Peter, don't do something you might regret." He dodged as Peter splashed him and El, who was chuckling,  managed to get the blunt of it.

"Oh, it's on now boys."

"Honey let's not go too far now." She kept advancing on them so he pulled his own pis aller (move of last result). He grabbed Neal and pulled him in front of him. "Take him, he started it!"

"Peter!" He tried to sound angry but his laughing betrayed him.

"Both of you, out. Before things really get ugly." El growled. She was protective of her kitchen!

"Yes ma'am." They both scurried out to the living room and she finally broke into a smile.

"I win." She simply said and went back to work on the dishes.

 


	10. Sick Day

 

It was a beautiful Saturday morning in mid fall when El was in the kitchen making breakfast while Peter was at the table drinking a cup of coffee and enjoying the morning paper.

 

"Neal's still not up?" El asked as she took a seat with two plates of food in her hands.

 

Peter folded the paper up and made room for the plate El brought him. "Not yet, I'll go get him." Peter went upstairs and knocked on the door. “Hey Neal, time to get up.” He waited a moment for a response but didn’t get one. “Neal?” He knocked again. Not getting an answer again he opened the door. The room was dark and he saw a figure curled up in the bed facing away from him. He walked closer to him and saw Neal shaking.

 

Neal cracked an eye open and closed them again, groaning like a dying whale the whole time.

 

“Yeah I feel like that every morning Neal, it doesn’t mean you get to sleep in all day.” Peter said with a smile.

 

Peter only got another groan in response and a string of sounds that may or may not have been words. He had a hunch with what was wrong and that was confirmed when he felt Neal’s forehead with the back of his hand. Peter walked out of the room without a word and returned a minute later with a thermometer. He sat down on the edge of the bed and spoke quietly to Neal.

 

“I’m going to need you to sit up Neal. Can you do that for me?” Neal groaned and shifted in bed until he was sitting up. He moaned and put his head against Peter’s shoulder as he closed his eyes again.

 

“Don’ feel good, Pe’er.” Neal muttered.

 

Peter rubbed his hand up and down Neal’s arm. “I know buddy, but I’m going to need you to open your mouth for a second and put this under your tongue until it beeps alright?”

 

Neal nodded, not trusting himself to speak and opened his mouth. Neal made sure the thermometer was under his tongue and tried to ignore the pounding in his head. After a minute the thermometer beeped and Peter checked the reading. He hummed at the results. “102.2. Looks like you caught yourself a case of the flu.”

 

“My ‘ead ‘urts.” Neal groaned.

 

“Does anything else hurt?” Peter inquired.

 

“M’ st’mach.” Neal muttered in Peter’s shoulder.

 

“Okay,” Peter started to get up. “Lay down while I go get some ibuprofen for your head and it should also help bring your fever down.” Neal just nodded, his eyes closed still, as Peter went down stairs.

 

“Where’s Neal?” El asked when she saw her husband come downstairs alone.

 

“Neal has caught the flu.” Peter replied as he put a piece of bread in the toaster and got some orange juice out of the fridge and poured it in a glass.

 

“Did you take his temperature? If it’s too high I can stay home to watch over him.” El said as she grabbed her phone from the table.

 

Peter put his hand over her phone. “It’s fine hon. He has a temp of 102.2 and I have vacation days. We’ll be fine.”

 

“Are you sure? Because-” Peter cut her off with a quick kiss.

 

“Everything here will be fine.” He repeated. “And I know how important this gig is too you.”

 

El sighed. “Alright. But call me if anything happens.”

 

“I promise.” He kissed her again. “Now go. Someone has to be bringing home a paycheck.” Peter joked.

 

“I love you.”

 

“Love you too.”

 

El’s phone rang in her hand. She checked the caller ID and saw it was her assistant. She answered it after turning around and grabbing her purse off the table. “I know I’m late.” She listened to the other side of the line and whispered sorry to Peter as she walked out the door. “Well tell the caterer to-” Her voice cut off as the front door slammed shut and Peter was left alone with a sick Neal. The toaster popped out the toast and he ran over to finish.

 

*line break*

 

Peter pushed open Neal’s door and set a plate with toast and a cup of orange juice on the night stand. He put a plastic bucket on the floor near Neal’s head and then pulled a bottle of pills out of his pocket. He set that down by the orange juice and sat down on the edge of the bed.

 

He brushed Neal’s hair away from his forehead. “Hey buddy, I’m going to need you to wake up for a couple minutes.” Neal slowly uncurled from the ball he was in and rubbed one his eyes. “I got you some medicine but you need to sit up all the way, alright?” Neal nodded slowly and sat up against the headboard. Peter finally got his first good look at Neal and it didn’t look good. His face was pale and he had dark shadows under his eyes. He took two pills out of the bottle and gave them to Neal along with the orange juice.

 

Neal took them and swallowed with a grimace. He set the glass down and saw the plate with toast.  “Not hungry.” He croaked.

 

“I figured as much but you need to eat something. Just have two bites and then you can go back to sleep.” Neal sighed and took the plate, too tired to argue. He took two small bites and then handed the plate back to Peter. “Thank you. There’s a bucket here if you get sick and I’ll be right downstairs if you need anything.” Peter got up and ruffed Neal’s hair as he settled back into a ball.

 

Peter went down to the kitchen and set the cup and plate in the sink. He called in sick for him and Neal and asked for some files to be brought to his house so he can work from home.

 

“No problem Peter. I’ll send Barrigan over right away.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

*line break*

 

After thirty minutes Peter heard a knock at the door and answered to see Diana holding a box of files.

 

“Hey Di. Thanks for this.”

 

“No problem boss. So how is he?” Diana asked as she put the box on the coffee table.

 

“Sleeping so far. I got him to eat a couple bites of toast but that’s it.” Right after Peter said this he heard Neal call for him from upstairs. “Speak of the devil.”

 

“Well I’m going to get back to the office before I catch what he has. Hope Neal feels better.” Diana turned to the door.

 

“Alright, I’ll talk to you later. Thanks again for the files.” Peter patted her on the shoulder as he passed to go upstairs. Diana gave a two finger salute as she left.

 

Peter cracked Neal’s door open and entered the dark room. Neal was sitting up and hunched over the bucket. “Hey, you’re alright kiddo. I’m right here.” Peter sat down and started to rub his back as he gagged. “Just let it out.”

 

Neal just coughed and spit in the bucket. “It feels like somethin’ is tryin’ to crawl out of my stomach.” Neal leaned into Peter in exhaustion and Peter just wrapped his arm around Neal in a half hug. “Can you just shoot me and put me out of my misery?”

 

Peter rested his chin on top of Neal’s head. “As much as you annoy me sometimes, no. Sorry.” Peter gave Neal a quick kiss on the head. “How do you feel kid?”

 

“Like I got hit by a semi, they backed up over me, and then ran over me again.”

 

“I figured as much. Do you want to try to eat something? I can heat up some soup and you can lay on the couch.”

 

“If I say no you’re just going to make me eat something else, aren’t you.” Neal stated it as a fact.

 

“No, but you really should have a couple bites of something.” Neal sighed and wrapped one of the blankets on the bed around himself while grabbing his pillow.

 

“Fine but I get the tv remote.”

 

*line break*

 

Peter came downstairs after rinsing out the bucket to find Neal laying on the couch with Antique Roadshow on. “Have you spotted any forgeries?” Peter asked as he replaced the box of files with the bucket on the coffee table.

 

Neal yawned before answering in a bored tone. “The porcelain doll that’s on right now is a fake.”

 

Peter set the box on the table and whipped around. “Really?” He asked in a tone of disbelief as he went over to the tv.

 

“Yup.” Neal popped the p. “The blush is the wrong shade of red.” They watched for a minute before the host on the show repeated what Neal had told Peter. “Told you.”

 

Peter hummed and went to the kitchen to heat up some soup.

 

*line break*

 

Peter got Neal to eat a couple bites of chicken noodle soup and drank some water before he fell back to sleep on the couch. Peter got a couple hours worth of work done and then took a break at two to make a sandwich. He heard Neal groan on the couch after he had put his plate in the sink. He went over to the couch to check on Neal. “ How are you feeling?” Peter asked as he felt his forehead.

 

“L’ke crap.”

 

“I bet. You still feel warm but not as bad as this morning. It’s been long enough, do you want to take anymore medicine?”

 

Neal just nodded so Peter got a glass of water and two more pills from the bottle and took it over to Neal, who was sitting up now. “Don’t drink this water too fast or you’ll get sick again, okay?”

 

Neal nodded again and grimaced at the bitter pills. “How’s work so far?”

 

“A blast.” Peter said sarcastically. “You want a couple files?”

 

“Think I’ll pass on that one.” Neal said as he layed back down.

 

“You sure? I don’t want to be hogging all the fun.” Peter smirked.

 

Neal just rolled over away from Peter.

 

*line break*

 

Around five Neal woke to the smell and sound of someone cooking. He got up and wrapped the blanket around his shoulders. He went to sit down at the island and watched Peter cook. Peter turned around and saw Neal. “You’re starting to look better.” Peter noted some color returning to Neal’s face.

 

“I’m starting to feel better. It doesn’t feel like there’s a mariachi band in my head anymore.”

 

“Are you hungry? Do you want the rest of your soup?” Neal nodded so Peter put it in a bowl and microwaved it. “Bon appetite. Would you like any orange juice with that sir?” Peter put on a bad french accent.

 

Neal chuckled at the horrible accent. “Why yes monsieur.”  

 

“Good accent there.” Peter commented as he poured a glass of juice. “Although it’s cheating since you speak french.”

 

Neal shrugged. “Schematics. So, what’cha makin’ there iron chef?” Neal asked as he sipped the soup.

 

Peter sighed. “Well I’m trying to make chicken and rice. That’s simple right?” Peter took the chicken off the skillet and cut it up. Neal winced as Peter did that. “What?”

 

“It’s just, after you cook meat you should let it rest a couple minutes before cutting into it. That way you don’t lose moisture in the form of steam and it won’t dry out.” Peter just started at Neal for a moment. “What?”

 

“Where did you learn to cook?”

 

“Mozzie taught me.”

 

Peter rolled his eyes. “Of course he did.”

 

*line break*

 

After Neal finished the soup he attempted, and succeeded, at taking a shower without causing any bodily harm to himself. He came back downstairs in a clean t-shirt and sweatpants to find Peter sitting on the couch watching the game and nursing a beer. “How was your dry chicken?” Neal asked as he flopped down next to Peter.

 

Peter looked him up and down. “You sound better. Here, put this under your tongue.” He handed Neal the thermometer. Neal started to put up a fight but Peter spoke over him. “Now. Or you’re going back up to bed.” Neal gave in, knowing he was fighting a losing battle, but took the tv remote and started to flip through the channels. He settled on the food network and grabbed a pad of paper.

 

Now you can learn how to properly make chicken.

 

Peter looked up at Neal after reading the note and glared at a smirking Neal. The thermometer beeped and Peter checked it. “99 degrees on the nose. Must have been a twenty-four hour bug. Looks like you’re going to be able to go to work tomorrow and get caught up on what you missed today.”

 

“You know, I’m really not feeling well again. Maybe I should stay home again tomorrow, just to be safe. I wouldn’t want anybody else getting sick.”

 

“Well in that case,” Peter got up and picked Neal up over his shoulder fireman style. “Back to bed with you.” Peter exclaimed.

 

“Peter? Peter, put me down!” Neal tried to wiggle out of Peter’s hold but he had too good of a hold on him. He complained the whole way up and to the bedroom. “Let go of me!” Neal said through a fit of giggles from Peter tickling him.

 

“Alright then.” Peter dropped Neal onto the bed.

 

“Jerk.” Neal said through fits of laughter.

 

Peter sat down out of breath. “I think you strained my back.”

 

Neal scoffed. “I did? You’re the one who threw me over your shoulder.” Neal shoved Peter with his knee.

 

Peter got up and threw the tv remote to Neal’s tv at him. “There, now you can watch your fancy cooking shows while I go watch the end of the game.” Peter started for the door but stopped just before leaving and turned around. “And I can cook just fine.” After that he turned around and left.

 

“Just being able to cook pot roast doesn’t count!” Neal called after him.

 

*line break*

 

The next morning Neal woke up energized and refreshed. He headed downstairs and only saw El sitting at the table eating breakfast. “Where’s Peter?” He asked as he got a plate of pancakes and bacon. He sat down across from El and dug in.

 

“Well it looks like you got your wish.” Peter said from behind him. Neal turned around and saw him wrapped in a blanket. “Whatever you had I managed to catch.”

 

“You know, you were right yesterday. I should really go to the office today and get caught up on what I missed yesterday.” Neal started to get up but Peter put his hands on Neal’s shoulders and pushed him back down.

 

“Oh no. You’re staying here while El goes to stay with a friend before she catches this.”

 

“Sorry sweetie. You two have fun now.” El waved goodbye and left with a duffel bag that was by the door.

 

“And since I’m the one sick today, that means I get the remote and you get to be the one that rinses out the sick filled bucket.” Peter patted Neal on the back and went over to the couch. Neal groaned and said some unchoice words. “What was that?” Peter asked from the couch.

 

Neal put on a fake smile. “Oh goody!”

 

“That’s what I thought you said.”

 

Neal rolled his eyes and got to work, breakfast forgotten.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I uploaded, it must be the apocalypse. Truthfully, I was lazy and this was my first sick!fic so hopefully it wasn’t too horrible. Make sure to check out my other parental!Peter/Neal fic You Are My Sonshine for I’m going to be updating that in the next week or so. I swear it will be out before Christmas! Well I’m going to upload this and go to bed since it’s like 1:30 in the morning but I wanted to get this done tonight and I did!


	11. Finals Hell

Peter watched Neal from his office as the younger man yawned for the third time in as many minutes. He started to pack his laptop and leave for his lunch right on the dot. Peter noticed he started doing this around the beginning of October. It’s the middle of December now and Peter’s starting to get worried since it looks like he hasn’t been getting enough sleep the past couple days. Peter got up and called Diana up to his office.

 

“You wanted to see me, sir?” Diana asked as she closed his door.

 

“Yeah. I have a gut feeling Neal’s been up to something. It may be nothing but,”

 

Diana crossed her arms and relaxed a little since this wasn’t going to be an ‘official’ talk. “You notice that he’s been taking his laptop to lunch every day for the past couple months, too?”

 

Peter nodded. “That, and he’s taken exactly hour long lunches and now he’s been tired the past couple days on top of it. Do you know anything about that?”

 

Diana shook her head. “‘Fraid not. Jones and I have seen him in the coffee shop down the street a couple times but that’s it. You want me to go ‘run into him’.” Diana did air quotes.

 

“Just make sure he’s not doing something he shouldn’t be?”

 

“No problem, boss.”

 

*line break*

 

Diana spotted Neal on his laptop in the corner of the shop sipping on a coffee with his eyes glued to his screen. She bought a coffee for appearances and then walked over to where Neal was seated. “Fancy seeing you here.”

 

Neal’s head shot and he minutely tilted his screen away from Diana. “What are you doing here?”  

 

Diana gestured to the coffee. “On my break. What are you up to? Peter got you doing work over lunch?” She bent over to look at his screen but Neal pulled the laptop away before she got a look.

 

“Yes! I mean, no. Not exactly. it’s, complicated?”

 

Diana just raised her eyebrows at him.

 

“That was a really bad lie wasn’t it?”

 

Diana sat down across from him. “My neice can lie better than that and she’s three. What’s really going on?”

 

Neal chewed on his lip as he thought how to tell her. “Do you promise not to tell Peter?”

 

“Is it illegal?”

 

“No.” He answered right away. “Completely above board.”

 

“Then sure. I promise not to tell Peter.”

 

“You can’t write it down either.”

 

Diana sighed, getting annoyed. “I promise, whatever you tell me will in no way get back to Peter. Now what is it?”

 

Neal took a deep breath then turned the computer to Diana. “I’ve been taking online classes from the local community college to get my GED.”

 

Diana smiled. “Neal, that’s great. Why are you keeping it from Peter though?”

 

Neal turned the computer back towards himself. “I wanted it to be a surprise. I also have a problem that maybe you can help me with. See, it’s finals week next week and-”

 

“Neal, I will not help you cheat.”

 

Neal gave her a look. “This stuff is easy. It’s high school completion classes, not a masters degree. The problem I have is that the campus is out of my ratius.”

 

Diana looked confused. “But they’re online classes anyway. The whole point is to do it away from campus.”

 

“And that’s what I thought, until I got this email from all my professors last week. To ensure there’s no cheating all finals are given on campus.”

 

Diana was starting to understand. “You need someone to escort you to the campus to take the test since it’s out of you radius.”

 

“Exactly. Will you take me? Please?” Neal gave her puppy eyes.

 

“As much fun as it is to see you beg, I can’t.”

 

“But I need to go to pass.”

 

“I’m sorry Neal, but only Peter can take you out of your radius. The only exception is if he gives another agent written permission, and even then we would have to tell him where we’re taking you.”

 

Neal sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “Well what am I suppose to do then?”

 

“The only way is to tell Peter the truth.”

 

“But I was going to surprise him when it’s all done. After this quarter I’m still going to have to take winter, spring, and summer quarter before I’m done with the high school completion program.”

 

“Then you’re just going to have to surprise him early then. You’re going to need to go to the campus those other quarters anyway during finals. It’ll be fine, Peter will be proud.” She patted him on the shoulder. “See you back at the office.”

 

“Bye.” Neal said absentmindedly as he was deep in thought.

 

*line break*

 

For the next week, Neal kept making excuses on why he couldn’t go to tell Peter about his classes. The next monday he was in one of the old file rooms when Diana stormed in and slammed the door shut, leaving him trapped.

 

“Why haven’t you told Peter yet?” 

 

“I haven’t had the time.” Neal lied smoothly.

 

Diana called him on it. “Bull.”

 

“No it’s-”

 

Diana cut him off. “Don’t you dare lie to me again, Caffrey. Now why haven’t you told Peter yet? Or are you chicken?”

 

Neal got defensive. “No I’m not.”

 

Diana smirked. “Then let’s go tell him.”

 

“Fine.”

 

“Fine.” She grabbed him by the arm and pulled him out of the file room.

 

“Ow.” He pulled his arm out of her grip.

 

“Baby.” She teased.

 

“You’re like an older brother I never wanted.” Neal said as he cradled his arm. “This is probably going to bruise.” He muttered to himself.

 

She rolled her eyes. “And you’re like a little sister I never wanted.” She shot back. They stopped in front of Peter’s office. “In.” 

 

He opened the door and she gave a little shove. He stumbled in and Diana followed in after. She closed the door and blocked it so Neal couldn’t try to run.

 

Peter watched the whole thing in silence. “May I help you two?” He finally asked when no one made a move to speak first.

 

“Neal has something to tell you.” Diana said.

 

Peter sighed and set his pen down. “What did you do Neal?”

 

“Nothing! I just have to ask you something.” Neal paused.

 

“Which is…” Peter urged Neal to talk. “Use your words Neal.”

 

“I’ve been taking online classes to get my GED and I need you to take me to the campus on thursday and friday so that I can take all my finals.” Neal said in a rush.

 

“I know.”

 

Both Neal and Diana looked shocked. “You know?!” They both said.

 

Neal turned to Diana. “You promised you wouldn’t tell him!”

 

“Diana didn’t tell me anything so calm down.”

 

“Then how?”

 

Peter opened a drawer and pulled out ads and catalogs from the college. “I seem to be getting your mail. So I made a couple calls and found out that one Neal Caffrey seems to be enrolled.”

 

“Did you use FBI resources to spy on me?”

 

“No, that’s illegal and I could get fired for that. I just told them I’m your father. Once I supplied your social security number they told me all your classes.” Peter smiled. “The only thing I haven’t figured out is why you didn’t tell me in the first place.”

 

Neal sighed. “That just seems to be the question of the day.” He muttered. “I wanted it to be a surprise."

 

Peter smiled at Neal and Neal smiled back shyly. 

 

"The only thing I'm wondering," Diana broke the moment. "Is why you wrote Peter's address instead of your own. You had to know that stuff would be mailed there."

 

Neal shrugged. "I figured Peter would just write it off as junk mail. Since the FBI doesn't pay me,” Neal shot a glare at Peter. “I needed to sign up for financial aid and if I put down the address for June’s house my request would have been denied.” 

 

Peter stood up. “Well now that that is settled, you two can get back to work.” Peter pointed at the two of them and put his other hand on his hip. “And no more fighting.”

 

“She started it.” Neal pointed right at Diana.

 

“No way Caffrey, you started this one.” Diana shot back.

 

“And I’m ending it.” Peter spoke over both of them. He started to herd them out of his office. “Neal, stop teasing Diana. And Diana, stop taking Neal’s bait, you know he’s only after a reaction.” Peter turned back into his office. “I’m like a parent with a room full of children.” He muttered as he shut his door.

 

“We love you too, Dad!” Neal yelled before the door shut all the way. He turned to Diana and smiled. She just rolled her eyes and went back to work.

 

*line break*

 

An hour later Neal sighed in frustration and rolled over to Jones’ desk, who happened to be the closes to his. “Do you know much about biology?”

 

Jones gave Neal a confused look. “Not on the top of my head. Why?”

 

“I need to memorize all the parts of an animal and plant cell plus be able to name the function of each part.” At Jones’ still confused face Neal clarified further. “It’s for my final on thursday. I am going to officially get a high school diploma by the end of summer.” Neal said proudly.

 

“Do you have any of the parts memorized yet?” Diana cut in.

 

Neal acted insulted. “Of course I do!” He numbered them on his fingers as he named them. “The nucleus is the brain, the cell membrane is the wall thing around the cell, and the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.” 

 

Jones and Diana waited for Neal to continue. “That’s it?” Diana finally asked. Neal smiled sheepishly and shrugged. “You told me in the coffee shop that this stuff was easy.”

 

“It is. The math, english, and history parts at least. Chemistry would be pretty simple too since Mozzie taught me reactions for forgeries when I was younger. But I’ve never had to know the difference between an animal and plant cell, or the animal kingdom, or any of that stuff.”

 

“Do you at least know the six kingdoms of how life is classified?” Jones asked.

 

“I think fungi is one?”

 

Jones and Diana looked at each other and groaned in unison.

 

“What’s 23,890 times 44,903 equal?” Jones tried again.

 

Neal thought for a second. “1,072,732,670.”

 

Jones shook his head. “Dude, how can you have such a big gap of knowledge missing? Did you only go up to eighth grade or something?”

 

Neal smiled and did a small bow in his chair. “Middle school drop out at your service.” Diana and Jones both looked shocked so Neal shrugged. “What can I say, middle school didn’t agree with me. And I’ve gotten by so far without the knowledge of plant cells.”

 

“Until now.” Diana pointed out with a grin.

 

“Until now.” Neal agreed. “Think Peter will know?”

 

“Think Peter will know what?” Peter himself said from behind Neal.

 

“Do you happen to have a wide range of biology knowledge and willing to teach it to me by thursday?”

 

Peter frowned. “Have you had since the beginning of October to memorize all this and waited three days before the final to do it?”

 

“If I say yes will you not help me? Because if that’s so then I’ve had it memorized the whole time.” Neal took a sip of the coffee on his desk.

 

Peter groaned. “Damn it Neal. Okay, you two,” he pointed at Diana and Jones. “No more gossiping. Get back to work.”

 

“Yes boss.”

 

“Neal, my office. Take all your notes.” Neal nodded and gathered all his things together. They both went up to Peter’s office. “Sit.” Peter pointed to the small, round table next to his desk and Neal obeyed without question. “Now, you are about to partake in one of the oldest ways of studying for a final, flashcards.”

 

“Seriously? Your big fancy way of studying is  flashcards ?”

 

“Have you ever studied for a final?”

 

“Well, no, but-”

 

“Then you’re going to try it this way.”

 

Neal scoffed. “There is no way flashcards work  that  well. Did you use them in college? And at Quantico?”

 

“Yup.”

 

“And the whole Harvard crew out there? Did they use flashcards too?” Neal leaned back in his chair and gestured to the agents in the bull pen.

 

“Come here.” Peter opened his door and addressed all the agents. Neal got up while rolling his eyes and stood next to Peter. “Everyone that went to Harvard, would you please raise your hands.” Everyone raised their hands. “Okay, now keep your hand raised if you had to use flashcards during your finals.” About one or two agents put their hands down but the rest kept them raised. “Thank you.” They went back into Peter’s office and sat down in their respective seats. “Told you.” Is all Peter said smugly.

 

Neal sighed. “Fine, I’ll try making the flashcards.”

 

*line break*

 

Neal ended up using the flashcards, much to the amusement of Peter, for the next three days as he got ready for his final. Thursday morning at seven he showed up at Peter’s house so Peter can take him to the campus.

 

“You ready?” Peter asked Neal in the car.

 

“As I’ll ever be.”

 

“Which finals do you have again today?” Peter asked as he switched lanes.

 

“From eight thirty until ten thirty I have my timed essay, which will be a persuasive essay by the way.”

 

“So your reputation as a con man is riding on getting an A.”

 

“Exactly.” Neal said with a laugh. “And after that from eleven until one I have my biology final.”

 

Peter pulled into a parking spot at the campus. “Your favorite subject. Do you feel like you studied enough?”

 

Neal grabbed his messenger bag by his feet. “As well as I could.”

 

“Good luck then.” Peter reached behind him and grabbed the morning paper. 

 

Neal froze before he opened the car door. “Wait, you’re staying here?”

 

“Yup.” Peter answered as he opened to the sports section. “Got a deviled ham and everything.” Peter put the paper on his lap. “That reminds me,” He reached back again and grabbed a brown paper bag. “El packed you a lunch. Some french name I can’t pronounce.”

 

“Peter, this is seriously embarrassing.”

 

Peter just picked up his paper again. “Technically I’m suppose to go in with you since this is out of your radius, but if you would rather do it that way…” Peter started to slowly fold his paper as if to put it away.

 

“On second thought, this is fine!” Neal pushed back the sleeve of his hoodie. “Wow, look at the time! I should get going so I’m not late. Bye Dad, see you at one!” Neal rushed out of the car. He found the classroom easily and took a seat after signing in behind a couple other people who got there before him. Five minutes later he realized what he said. He smiled after a moment of thinking it over.

 

*line break*

 

Monday morning Neal came into the office beaming. 

 

“I’m guessing the finals went well.” Diana commented.

 

Neal sat down next to Diana’s desk. “They did. The grades were posted this morning and guess who got an eighty seven on their biology test?”

 

Diana faced forward towards Jones. “Ha! Pay up Jones.”

 

“Damn Neal, I bet you could get an A.” Jones grumbled as he gave Diana a couple folded bills.

 

“Please,” Diana said while counting her money. “You bet someone could get an A in biology after just getting introduced to the subject three months ago. Even Neal can’t pull that off.”

 

“Hey!” Neal butt in. “I’m sitting right here you know.”

 

“I can see that.” Peter said as he walked by. “And yet you should be at your desk. Hop to it kid.” Peter ruffled Neal’s hair as he walked pass.

  
“Peter!” Neal whined. “You messed up my hair.” Neal huffed as he tried to fix it while he went back to his desk. Peter just continued to his office. He sat down at his desk and just watched as Neal kept trying to fix his hair. Peter finally cracked a smile and quietly laughed at his pseudo son’s antics. 

**Author's Note:**

> TBC?
> 
> I was EXTREMELY bored in my english class last week and wrote this baby up instead of working on my speech. All the stuff Neal was doing in this was what I noticed EVERYONE in class doing. I drew what Neal did in this fic (I spent 2 and a half periods on it!) and at some point I'm going to put it up on my deviantART but I wanted to get this up first.
> 
> Second point, I'm thinking of making a SEQUAL for this so I'm going to leave it in-complete for now. If I do, it won't be for awhile, I'm in a play at the moment and that literally sucks all your free time away plus turns out if you don't finish work in class you have to work on it at home...


End file.
